1、上課就上課，上網就上網，你讓我上網課什麼意思。
Class on the Internet on the Internet, you let me Internet class what do you mean.
2、生活就像發朋友圈，無需強求，上帝自然會安排好看的人給你點讚。
Life is like a circle of friends, no need to force, God will naturally arrange good-looking people to praise you.
3、為什麼吃火鍋的時候，有小肥牛有小肥羊，就是沒有小肥豬呢，因為小肥豬都圍在桌邊吃小肥牛和小肥羊。
Why is it that when eating hot pot, there are little fat cattle and little fat sheep, but there are no little fat pigs? Because little fat pigs are all around the table to eat little fat cattle and little fat sheep.
4、喜歡在下午更新動態，因為怕你早晚會愛上我。
I like to update the news in the afternoon, because I'm afraid you will fall in love with me sooner or later.
5、有時候挺討厭自己的，不會說話，太過善良，沒什麼心眼，還這麼可愛。
Sometimes I hate myself very much. I can't speak. I'm too kind and have no heart and eyes. I'm so cute.
6、日子很狗，但我不敢罵他，怕他瘋狂咬我。
The day is very dog, but I dare not scold him, afraid he crazily bites me.
7、是不是美女的生活都比較坎坷，如果是這樣，我認輸，輸得一塌糊塗。
Is the life of beautiful women more bumpy, if so, I admit defeat, lost in a mess.
8、圖片僅供參考，實物以本人為準。
The picture is for reference only, and the material object is subject to me.
9、這幾天沒發朋友圈，主要是為了引起你們的注意，想玩欲擒故縱。
These days, I haven't sent a circle of friends, mainly to attract your attention and play hard to get.
10、這個周末想跟男朋友去看電影，請問有什麼好的男朋友推薦一下的。
I want to go to the cinema with my boyfriend this weekend. Could you recommend some good boyfriend.
11、我發朋友圈一般都會屏蔽家人，不為別的，我就怕他們認不出我。
I usually block my family members in my circle of friends. I'm afraid they won't recognize me for nothing else.
12、熬夜可以預防老年痴呆，因為熬夜可以有效阻止你活到老年。
Staying up late can prevent Alzheimer's, because staying up late can effectively prevent you from living to old age.
13、你們誇美女一般都怎麼誇的啊？教我一下可以嗎？
How do you usually praise beautiful women? Can you teach me something?
14、人類大腦真的太神奇了，它從出生那天起每天24小時都正常運作，但只要我們參加考試，它就會立刻停止。
The human brain is really amazing. It works 24 hours a day from the day of birth, but as long as we take the exam, it will stop immediately.
15、我終於買了我人生中的第一輛車，勞斯萊斯幻覺。
I finally bought the first car in my life, the Rolls Royce illusion.
16、女孩子要稍微做點壞事，然後老天爺一生氣，就跟你發個小夥。
The girl should do something bad, and then when the god gets angry, she will send a guy to you.
17、美女一般都不發自拍，但我敢。
Beauty usually doesn't shoot herself, but I dare.
18、上一次兩個男人為我大打出手，是在客運站兩個的哥搶生意。
The last time two men fought for me, they were fighting for business in two cabs at the passenger station.
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圖片來自網絡/侵刪