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正文翻譯
原創翻譯：龍騰網 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻譯：zmmyc 轉載請註明出處
If you were a villain and could choose any animal to fight by your side, what animal would you choose and why?
如果你是一個惡棍，可以選擇任何動物與你並肩作戰，你會選擇什麼動物，為什麼？
評論翻譯
原創翻譯：龍騰網 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻譯：zmmyc 轉載請註明出處
ThunderingSacks
I would probably choose a flying one. Either an eagle or owl. But since I’m gonna be a villain one of those giant vultures would suffice.
我可能會選擇一個會飛的動物，鷹或者貓頭鷹。不過既然我是個惡棍，一隻禿鷹就足夠了。
ArgentStonecutter
Owls are a pretty common villain theme in comics.
貓頭鷹是漫畫中常見的反派動物。
Sal_The_Dragon
Lion king, I see. Scar loses though
獅子王，我明白了。最後刀疤輸了
Just_A_Player_
How about a Canadian Goose?
加拿大鵝怎麼樣？
kingdyl07
Just dont bring him near kids in the zoo
不要讓動物園的猩猩接近你們的孩子
dabuku1
Honey badger. Self-explanatory
蜜獾，理由不言自明
2ndfloorhigh
Honey badger don''t give a shit
蜜獾才不在乎呢
tinkrman
Oh nasty!
哦，真噁心！
StormOfHoney
Can''t believe how far down this is!
真不敢相信你們還能選擇它！
heartscrew
The one with the sharpest fangs wins.
尖牙利齒的動物可以勝任。
13Mac_ 13Mac
Komodo dragon... Actually the komodo dragon would be the main villain, and id be the companion animal
科莫多龍... 實際上科莫多龍才是大惡棍，我只是它的伴侶動物
Gden
I can see it the hero beats you down and you laugh and say "oh you thought I was the boss" and the Komodo stands on two legs and starts laughing
我腦補的場景是，劇中的英雄把你打倒，你笑著說「哦，你不會以為我是大反派吧」 ，然後科莫多龍站起來開始大笑
zender23
But in animation it wont look that good
但是在動畫片中，它看起來不會那麼和諧
80000_days 80000天
Black panther. lethal, stealthy, agile, badass AF...
黑豹，致命性和隱蔽性強，動作敏捷，跳的還高.。
Sal_The_Dragon
Checks all the villain criteria
檢查所有的惡棍符合標準
primepio
So you’re an evil Drizzt Do』urden?
所以你是一個邪惡的小精靈？
Garg_and_Moonslicer
Would he have a Vibranium suit?
他會有一套振金服嗎？
ZeiglerJaguar
Leopard or jaguar?
美洲豹還是美洲豹？
echoAwooo
Yah but Guenhwyvar isn''t going to be happy with you.
是的，但是關海法和你在一起是不會快樂的。
PaperbackBuddha
Sea slug.
海蛞蝓。
Nobody would be expecting that.
沒有人會想到這一點。
Dolliiy
When hippos shit, they spin their tails in order to spread it all over the place. The radius they cover can reach up to 10 meters.
當河馬拉屎的時候，它們會轉動尾巴，以便把屎撒得到處都是。它們覆蓋的半徑可達10米。
real_zexy_specialist
This is clearly the best answer. Thick, semi-armored skin. Razor sharp teeth. Don’t take shit.
這顯然是最好的答案。身體厚實，半披甲的皮膚，鋒利的牙齒，還不說廢話。
cidiusgix
Finally a decent answer. Nothing fucks with a hippo.
終於有個像樣的答案了，河馬真是無惡不作。
snackattack747
Vicious bastards
惡毒的混蛋
xaeromancer
Apparently it''s the third deadliest creature on the African continent.
顯然它是非洲大陸第三致命的生物。
Only mosquitoes and people kill more people.
只有蚊子和人才會殺死更多的人。
Erebus_Zero Erebus zero
Provide me with meth and I’m in
給我提供冰毒，我就加入
Prometheus_Turati
To be honest, the Florida man will probably just build you an airplane out of Bud Lights and crash into your ex’s house while fighting an alligator while singing the
Star Spangled Banner. Overall, good choice
老實說，佛羅裡達人可能會用百威之光給你造一架飛機，然後一邊和鱷魚搏鬥，一邊唱著星條旗永不落，最後開飛機撞上你前妻的房子。總的來說，這是個不錯的選擇
Zer0M0tivation
that’s too op, you need a nerf
這波操作太騷了，你需要一個實力稍弱的夥伴
DownvoteMasterhehe
Animals mate not monsters
動物交配不出怪物
Marmitecashews
If only real animals are allowed, an elephant.
如果只能選真實的動物，那就選一頭大象。
If made up animals are allowed, a demon elephant.
如果虛構的動物也能選的話，那就選一頭惡魔大象。
Hegemooni
Metal as hell
鐵石心腸
ItsAlways2EZ 2ez
Ancient psychic tandem war elephant
古老的通靈雙人戰象
Cowboy_Spongebob
If made up animals are allowed I’m taking a dragon or a big ass lion
如果虛構的動物也可以的話，我會選一條龍或者一頭大屁股的獅子
technitaur
A Cape Buffalo. They''re massive tanks and they also understand the concept of revenge. Supposedly, they can [remember] an individual years after being
wounded/threatened, and will do everything they can to hunt down and kill the person.
南非水牛。他們有著坦克般的體型，也懂得復仇的概念。據說，他們能夠記住使它們受傷或者威脅它們的人好多年，並且會盡一切可能追捕並殺死這個人。
And also they''re the closest thing to a minotaur I could have as a real-world animal.
同時，它們也是我所能擁有的最接近於現實世界動物的牛頭人。
Tartaras1
So they''re essentially oversized crows. Crows also seem to understand the concept of revenge, except what they lack in body mass they make up for in numbers, turning an entire flock against you.
它們本質上是超大型的烏鴉。烏鴉似乎也懂得復仇的概念，體重雖然不足，但是贏在數量多，可以讓整個烏鴉群一起攻擊你。
frog_without_a_cause
A raccoon. Better yet, make it a pack of raccoons, each with its own specific skillset.
一隻浣熊。更好的辦法是，選一群浣熊，每隻浣熊都有自己獨特的技能。
kiltedpastor
I read that wrong at first. I was trying to figure out why trash pandas needed a skillet.
我一開始讀錯了，我想弄明白為什麼垃圾熊貓需要一個平底鍋。
SexDrugsNskittles
While skimming this comment I had to do a double take because I thought you said the goose was DTF. Haha
在瀏覽這個評論的時候，我不得不重新審視一下，因為我以為你說這隻鵝是 DTF。哈哈
KENPACHI-KANIIN
Grizzlies. They’re tanks. A full grown exemplary grizzly bear is prolly worth a lot more than any who goes face to it. And they look cuddly
灰熊。他們就是坦克。一隻成年的灰熊比任何面對它的人都更有價值。它們看起來也很可愛
EDIT 1: wow, never knew this would get upvoted that much. I change my mind, i’m going with kodiak bears instead
編輯1: 哇，從來沒想到這個會得到這麼多的支持。如果我改變主意，我會選科迪亞克熊
MaynardJ222 222
Why not Polar?
為什麼不是極地？
atomicsoar
I''d go with a Kodiak, they''re grizzlies on steroids and I love them. A bit less cuddly looking but if I''m a villain that''s fine lol.
我會選科迪亞克，它們是打了類固醇的灰熊，我愛他們。看起來不那麼可愛，但如果我是一個惡棍，面相好不好看無所謂，lol。
Subliminal_Rose
Bears are that perfect mix between an absolute bone crushing machine and a derpy-faced ball of fur.
熊是骨頭粉碎機和皮毛球的完美結合。
twentyplusfortynine
Get near these huggable cuties and they will turn you into noodle.
接近這些小可愛，它們會把你捏成麵條。
TheScienceGiant
False. Black bear.
錯，是黑熊。
MaynardJ222 222
Canadian Goose. Just 1 is fine.
加拿大鵝，一隻就行了。
Iwinyoul0se 4. iwinyouloul0se
Dude it''s supposed to be a sidekick not the actual villain...
夥計，這是選一個幫手，不是選真正的大反派..。
Hq3473
Quick primer:
快速入門:
Canada Goose
加拿大鵝
Canadian goose
加拿大鵝
amborg
I scared off TWO Canadian geese that were messing with my friend’s dog the other day. I actually was really proud of that. Apparently if you also act like an angry goose it really freaks them out.
前幾天，我嚇跑了兩隻調戲我朋友狗的加拿大鵝。我真的為此感到驕傲。顯然，如果你也表現得像一隻憤怒的鵝，這真的會嚇壞他們。
OhHelloPlease
If you got a problem with Canada Gooses you got a problem with me and I suggest you let that one marinate!
如果你對加拿大鵝不爽，那就是對我不爽，我建議你把它醃一下！
InauspiciousGroan
You monster!
你這個怪物！
Astheperfectmoon
You evil bastard. Pure genius. I would flee at first honk.
你是一個邪惡的混蛋，也是一個天才。我一聽到喇叭聲就會逃跑。
buddycatz
I don’t mess with a Canada goose, even my dogs knows not to mess with a Canada goose...
我不會惹加拿大鵝，甚至我的狗都知道不要惹加拿大鵝..。
_Goose_
What about a British goose. Asking for a friend...
英國鵝怎麼樣? 替朋友問問..。
MyCodeNameIsBryan
Oof.. I came here thinking something poisonous, or venomous but I never thought to choose something toxic.
我來這裡的時候想的都是有帶毒的動物，但是我從來沒有想過要選擇有毒的動物。
Good choice!
不錯的選擇！
Azmedon
A white tiger because they look awesome.
一隻白虎，因為它們看起來很威猛。
shroom2021
A crab named citizen snips
一隻名叫「公民」的螃蟹尖叫起來
Edit: holy crap! My first award for a futurama reference. Thanks!
編輯: 我的天哪! 我的第一個未來學參考獎。謝謝！
Haggie
An elephant who never forgets... to kill
一頭永遠不會忘記... 殺戮的大象
King_Rhymer King rhymer
CITIZEN SNIIIIIIIPPSSSSS!!!!!
公民狙擊！
WhetForAnOmelette
Courage the cowardly dog
膽小的狗英雄
XavierMendel
The hero lies broken on the ground, gun pressed against their forehead.
英雄摔倒在地，槍頂著他們的前額。
"The things I do for love..."
「我為愛做的事... ... 」
Bang
砰
Marcie29
Would your catchphrase be "Stupid dog! You make me look bad !!!" ?
你的口頭禪會是「蠢狗! 你讓我很難堪! ! ! 」嗎？
brunosardine100
OoooOoooOooh!
嗚嗚嗚嗚！
RogueZ24
Black cat. You just can''t be a a villain without a black cat.
黑貓。沒有黑貓你就不能成為一個惡棍。
fiendishrabbit
Modern villains tend to go with white cats.
現代的反派人物傾向於選擇白貓。
islanders571
Pangolin
穿山甲
IncendiaryBlonde
This guy current events.
這傢伙是時事記者。
TheNorthComesWithMe
Also it''s an adorable endangered species. Anyone who attacks it is the real villain.
而且它還是一個可愛的瀕危物種，任何攻擊它的人都是真正的惡棍。
perro2verde
Now we know who started this shit
現在我們知道是誰幹的了
DashJackson
Pangolins can carry corona virus, so....you might be the winner here.
穿山甲可以攜帶冠狀病毒，所以... 你可能是最後的贏家。
Continue this thread 繼續這個線程
elmart0w0
An Emu
一隻鴯鶓
latetotheparty_again
The did win the Emu War of 1932. That''s a great choice.
他們確實贏得了1932年的鴯鶓戰爭，這是一個很好的選擇。
person2314
THEY ARE LIKE TANKS WHY WONT THEY DIE!!!!!
他們就像坦克，為什麼他們死不了！！！
hello_there_
Ah yes, a man of culture I see
啊，是的，我看到一個有文化的人
Pendrych
To paraphrase a certain villain: "ELMART0W0! RULER OF AUSTRALIA!"
套用某個反派人物的話: 「 ELMART0W0! 澳大利亞的統治者! 」
KingofHeck
Does it have to be a real animal? If so, I pick a capybara. Giant guinea pig friend for life! If not, I pick a dragon. Those things can fuck you up.
一定要是現實中的動物嗎？如果是這樣的話，我就選一隻水豚， 巨型豚鼠一輩子的朋友！如果不是，我選一條龍，那些東西會把你搞得一團糟。
scmrph
I feel like this movie ends with the heroes slaying the villain and adopting the capybara (because they are so chill and everyone loves them) but the capybara slowly and subtly pushes the heroes towards villainy, because he was the real villain all along.
我覺得這部電影的結尾是英雄殺死了惡棍。如果選擇水豚做幫手(因為他們冷靜，而且每個人都喜歡他們) ，它會慢慢地把英雄推向惡棍，因為它才是真正的惡棍。
Enali
Imagine tracking the villain down to the end of a pier on a grey rainy day, the waves are crashing and she''s completely alone, out of options, nowhere to go.
想像一下，在一個陰沉的雨天，追趕一個惡棍到碼頭的盡頭，海浪拍打著她，她孤身一人，走投無路。
When suddenly she turns around and makes a motion with her hand and a number of lovecraftian tentacles shoot out from the dark waters some swirling in the air, others
grabbing your companions and dragging them off the dock and into the abyss as they frantically, pleadingly try to reach out for anything to help. Only you remain... you draw your weapon.
突然，她轉過身來，用手做了個動作，一些觸手從黑暗的水中伸出，一些在空中盤旋，另一些抓住你的同伴，把他們從碼頭拖到深淵，瘋狂地懇求著，試圖抓住任何能夠幫助他們的東西。只
有你選擇留下... 並拔出你的武器衝向它。
(giant squid!)
(巨型烏賊!)
mywifemademegetthis
Me: takes like five steps back to get out of range.
我: 選擇一隻大概需要五步就能走出對方的攻擊範圍的動物。
Triviald
The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog.
Caerbannog 的殺手兔。
Only a holy hand grenade can stop us now!
只有榴彈才能阻止我們！
Edit: a letter.
編輯: 一封信。
feedmedammit
Is it behind the rabbit?
是在兔子後面嗎？
xxDeadLocker99xx 99xx
You stupid bastard you dont have any arms left!
你這個笨蛋，你連胳膊都沒有了！
HausOfCheeks
i was an opposum cuz i think it''d be funny
我會選負鼠，因為我覺得這很有趣
Stopman
You were?
是嗎？
sonkev34
Gonna go with Polar Bear or Tiger...pretty much the only animals that consider themselves above us on the food chain.
北極熊或者老虎... 幾乎是唯一認為自己在食物鏈上處於我們之上的動物。
dohrk
I see you have never met a chihuahua.
我知道你從沒見過吉娃娃。
St0neByte 0nebyte
Yeah polar bear is obvious answer. Insanely huge. Good swimmers. Look really cool. Move fast. Good to cuddle with. I want a polar bear.
北極熊是很明顯的答案。它體型超級巨大，是一名優秀的遊泳選手。看起來真的很酷，動作也敏捷。很適合抱在懷裡。我想要一隻北極熊。
ArgentStonecutter
Wolverine.
狼獾。
Sal_The_Dragon
What''s the most appealing thing about wolverines?
狼獾最吸引人的地方是什麼？
ThiefOfBananas
A tarrasque
一隻末日毀滅獸
Neon_Waffle
This is the correct answer
這是正確選擇
ak-king-47
Fictional or non-fictional?
虛構的還是非虛構的？
If fictional i would choose the Chimaera from the I am Number Four series. A shape shifting dog would be pretty dope to have as a villain.
如果是虛構的，我會選擇《我是第四號》系列中的奇美拉。用一隻會變形的狗來做反派是相當酷的事情。
If non-fictional I would choose a Titanoboa. A giant slithering snake would for sure be useful in situations where I have to strike fear in people.
如果不是虛構的，我會選擇一條泰坦巨蟒。一條巨大的滑行蛇肯定會讓人們感到恐懼的。
assaulttoaster
If it''s fictional Cthulu would be kinda useful.
如果是虛構的，我會選擇克蘇魯。
perro2verde
For fictional I would go with a giraffe
如果是虛構的，我會選擇長頸鹿
InquisitiveCookie
A polar bear. Or a honey badger. The first one because it''s fearsome, the second because of the memes.
一隻北極熊或者一隻蜜獾。第一個是因為它可怕，第二個是因為它生性生猛。
freedompower
A polar bear. Or a honey badger. The first one because it''s fearsome, the second because it''s fearless.
一隻北極熊或者一隻蜜獾。前者是因為它可怕，後者是因為它無所畏懼。
YourHatredSustainsMe
The meerkat, these things can be fierce!
貓鼬，這種東西很兇猛！
Sal_The_Dragon
SOUND THE ALARM! GET IN THE BURROW, ITS A CAT!!
拉響警報! 進洞裡去，是只貓! ！
The_Boogeypan
A fucking swan
一隻該死的天鵝
AltairRulesOnPS4 3. AltairRulesOnPS4
Is it just the one swan actually?
它真的只是一隻天鵝嗎？
kayonesoft
Probably any character from the Sonic fetish fandom. Only a very few people would want to mess with that.
可能任何來自音速狂熱粉絲團的角色。只有極少數人會想要招惹它們。
Pretend_Math
The what now
現在怎麼辦
CrystalTear
Assuming I could train it well, a spitting cobra. Sneaky, quiet, disruptive and deadly when necessary.
假設我能很好控制一條唾液眼鏡蛇。平常，它會很安靜，必要時，它又可以搗亂，甚至給以致命一擊。
UnicornPlatypus
An ordinary platypus. With a fedora.
一隻戴著軟呢帽的普通鴨嘴獸！
thearchertheundine
I was scrolling for this answer.
我一直在找這個答案。
kenba2099
He doesn''t do much.
可是他會做的不多。
Gasterfire6
Flamingo.
火烈鳥。
As people are confused why there’s a random flamingo running around, I would have already aimed my shot and would be ready to fire!
當人們困惑為什麼會有一隻火烈鳥到處亂跑的時候，我已經瞄準目標準備射擊了！
MrocznyMuffin
My nemesis''s mom.
我的死對頭的媽媽。
SenorDuck96
A honey badger. You can''t kill one of those little fuckers! And because of our evil bond, if I die, you die because it''ll rip your dick off
蜜獾。它就是殺不死的小強 因為我們之間邪惡的關係，如果我死了，你也會死，因為它會把你的老二扯下來
SpaceTheTurtle
Bats. Bats are cute. Plus they could just fly into my enemy''s mouth and bam! Coronavirus.
蝙蝠。蝙蝠很可愛。而且它們可以飛進我敵人的嘴裡然後砰! 讓他們感染冠狀病毒。
Lus_
A fucking pack of Orcas.
一群該死的奧卡。
Dowpie7
My dog. She makes me happy.
我的狗，她讓我很開心。
Zomaarwat Zomarwat
Crows, they''re smort as fuck
烏鴉，它們狡猾的很
BrackaBrack
Eagle, amoung the strongest eyes in the animal kingdom. Can spot a rabbit from 3.2 km away. Will give me the best advanced warning for any approaching heroes and I can plan accordingly.
動物擁有動物王國中最銳利的眼睛之一。能從3.2公裡外認出兔子。對於任何接近的英雄，都會提前警告我，我也可以據此做好準備。
jackstella
One of Carol Baskin''s tigers
卡羅爾·巴斯金的老虎之一
bicygal
Just Carole Baskin
只有卡羅爾 · 巴斯金
BetterThanHorus
Provided he has his armor
假設他有盔甲
hmmmmmmmnm
a penguin because it''s cute and it waddles
一隻企鵝，因為它搖搖擺擺地走了，很可愛
tehwhiteboi
「This is stabby」
「這是刺刀」
「Is that...? A roomba...? With a knife taped to it..?」
「那是... ... ? 一個吸塵器... ... ? 上面綁著一把刀... ... ? 」
「 he’s doing his best 」
」他正在盡力」
Rougetherug59
A butterfly. It’s self explanatory.
一隻蝴蝶，不言自明。
BlueEyedFremen
Santa Claus
聖誕老人
SnowQuixote
Another human. But like, a big one. With a machine gun and a samurai sword.
我會選一個拿著機關槍和武士刀的大塊頭。
the_bandit123 Bandit123
I would choose a black widow spider cause if u want to infiltrate a hero lair I''m gonna send the black widow cause it can blend in spiders are common and it very small so it almost won''t be seen and it can climb walls and shoot webs as a distraction or a method of escape but the only problem is it can easily get smashed
我會選擇一隻黑寡婦蜘蛛，因為如果你想潛入一個英雄的巢穴，我會安排黑寡婦去，因為它和普通蜘蛛長得相似，體型還小，它幾乎不會被注意到，它可以爬牆和分泌蜘蛛網作為分散注意力或逃跑的方法，但唯一的問題是它很容易被碾死。
phantomsmasquerade
A fish. No reason.
一條魚，沒什麼原因。
iDrinkJavaNEatPython 1. idrinkjava
Werewolf! Or a Dragon
狼人! 或者一條龍
Fomoreddit73
Dragon over werewolf. Werewolf has a very narrow window of effectiveness.
龍勝過狼人。狼人的效率沒有龍高。
mynextthroway
Can I have three? I want my 3 dogs. Sometimes, when you''re busy taking over the world, destroying cities, killing all that stand against you, it''s nice to sit down have my dogs come over for scratches. They love me for me, not because I rule the world.
我能要三個嗎？我要我的三條狗。有時候，當你忙著掌控世界，摧毀城市，殺死所有反對你的人時，坐下來讓我的狗過來抓抓也不錯。它們是愛我這個人，不是因為我統治世界。
OneSnazzy_Duck
I''d pick either an eagle, because it can go faster than I can and can retreive stuff that''s a moderate distance away (like in Tintin but with an eagle instead of a falcon) or an otter beause they''re so fucking cute.
我會選一隻鷹，因為它可以跑得比我快，而且可以返回去拿東西（如丁丁的故事，不過用的是鷹而不是獵鷹) ，或者水獺，因為它們太可愛了。
Invika17
COVID-19 infested bat.
自帶新型冠狀病毒的蝙蝠。
sborrell
A cockroach.... We are all machos untill the roach starts to fly!
一隻蟑螂... ...蟑螂一開始飛，我們都變成膽小鬼！
thatguybruv
My cat, hes a fucking ninja
我的貓，它是個忍者
sadogdogsad
A goose,because they randomly attack people.
一隻鵝，因為它們會隨機攻擊人類。
Cryogisdead
A stonefish
一條石魚
hairyboi123
A single wasp, and I''d train it to enter my enemies cars while they drive to make them crash
只要一隻黃蜂，我就會訓練它飛到我敵人的車子裡騷擾他們，讓他們撞車
Empty-Refrigerator
a seagull that has been trained to interrupt a super spy/hero and me just laughing my head off.
訓練一隻海鷗，用來打斷英雄與我之間的鬥爭，我只是笑得前仰後合。
"Well mister bond... you could kill it, but its on the endangered species list and that would be "criminal" of you MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH"
「邦德先生... ... 你可以殺了它，但是它在瀕危物種的名單上，你這樣做就是犯罪了。哈哈哈哈哈」
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