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謝謝觀看
兇棺
剃頭匠
中華神醫
純情陸少
傾城狂妃
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惹上首席總裁
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如果從沒愛過你
王妃的婚後指南
落難千金的逆襲
狂女重生：紈絝七皇妃
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END
謝謝觀看
So first you feel hurt. But then you feel helpless, completely and totally helpless. He just disappeared,
making you feel like you had absolutely no value or meaning to him whatsoever. And you might be
shocked, too. He might not have ever behaved this way before. So now you’re also unbelievably
disappointed. 「Really? Now I have to not like him? Now I have to think he’s a jerk? That’s what this
added up to? There’s got to be
some kind of reasonable explanation.」 So then you start
giving this great guy a big heap of your time and energy, making up excuses for why he’s disappeared
(he’s busy, he’s busy…and maybe he’s busy), still hoping that he will come to his senses and at least
drop you an e-mail. You then start going through everything you said, did, or wrote that might have
driven him away. What was the thing you said that was so inappropriate or needy, that he had no other
recourse than to head for the hills? You blame yourself for some perceived strategic misstep. 「Oh, if only
I had played it better! He would still be mine!」 Or simply, you’re worried that he’s dead on the street
somewhere. Why else would he just disappear like that?
So then, you want to call him and say something. Or write him. You’re either angry or hurt, or still
holding out hope that’s he’s in a coma at a hospital somewhere. But however you feel, you definitely
think it is your right to either yell at him or find out what happened. What’s worse than not knowing?
Nothing. Except maybe not getting to tell him off.
Greg would say that the best revenge in this situation is not anger, but emotional distance, as quickly as
possible. Greg would say that we have the answer. He didn’t want to stick around, and wasn’t man
enough to tell us to our face. Isn’t that answer enough? That’s when I would say to Greg, 「No, actually
it’s not. That answer’s definitely not good enough. I want to know why.」 And then Greg would say,
「Really? Are you sure? Do you really need him to detail every last reason why he didn’t feel like seeing
you ever again?」
I hate Greg.
Breakups are horrible. But to me, what’s truly devastating is to feel like you weren’t even worth a
breakup. Again, it’s natural to want to do something about that. Greg just wants that 「something」 to be
about moving on, as opposed to looking back. Not having closure is one of the most difficult things for
me (and many people) to live with, so I know why it might be impossible not to call the cad. But I guess
Greg would lecture you again (he’s such a know-it-all), and say that before you make that phone call or
write that e-mail, you should at least play it out in your head. Will it really make you feel better? Do you
think it will really change the way he feels about what he did, or you? Is it the only thing you can think of
that will help you move on? If it is, then I say to hell with Greg—give the guy a call. But I guess the hope
is (for me, at least) that when a guy no longer wants to communicate with me, and doesn’t have the
manners or courage to tell me that to my face, he’s given me all the information I need. It’s the toughest
one of all to put into practice. But I definitely like the kind of girl who could do it. Good luck to us all!
This is What It Should Look Like, by Greg