1、床以外的地方，都是遠方，這個冬天，我註定到不了遠方。
All the places beyond the bed are far away. This winter, I am destined not to be far away.
2、不想起床，讓人陷進去無法自拔的，不是愛情，是被窩。
Don't want to get up, let people fall into, can not extricate themselves, is not love, is the quilt.
3、尊敬的起床困難戶：您此次起床共用了5分鐘，您已擊敗了全國10%的用戶。
Dear households with difficulty in getting up: it took you 5 minutes to get up this time, and you have defeated 10% of the users in China.
4、起床困難戶，起個床，容易嗎，又是被拖，又是被拉的。
It's easy to get out of bed for those who are difficult to get up. They are dragged and pulled.
5、鬧鐘，如果你想叫我起床，除非你找到一個充分的理由，否則我就躺給你看。
Alarm clock, if you want to wake me up, unless you find a good reason, I'll show you.
6、如果有來生，我一定要做一床被子，不是躺在床上，就是在曬太陽！
If there is an afterlife, I must make a quilt, not lying in bed, is in the sun!
7、不想起床，因為被子生病的，需要照顧。
Do not want to get up, because the quilt is sick, need to take care of.
8、想到明天還有好多事要做，只好睡到後天。
Thinking that there are many things to do tomorrow, I have to sleep until the day after tomorrow.
9、上了生活的床，做快樂的海盜。
On the bed of life, to be a happy pirate.
10、起床是種能力，賴床是種技術，我能力有限，但技術卻很高。
Getting up is a kind of ability, lying in bed is a kind of technology. My ability is limited, but my skill is very high.
11、地球不重啟，我就不早起。
If the earth doesn't restart, I won't get up early.
12、躺上床的那一刻，我好像找到了真愛。
The moment I lay in bed, I seemed to find true love.
（圖片源自網絡，侵權聯刪）