為了不背叛老婆,我買了個充氣娃娃./Sex Dolls Offer Escape from Rejection

By Wang Yan

Chinese social media sites have been at witter with discussion over a picture series depicting a 28-year-old man and his sex doll. The pictures show the man hugging his doll in front of a sunlit window, staring lovingly into its eyes and kissing the dolls hand.

最近，一組28歲男青年與充氣娃娃的婚紗照引爆了網絡。

The photo series claims the man has cancer and took the pictures because he didn’t want to leave behind a widow. More cynical readers believe the series is a viral marketing campaign for the sex dolls manufacturer.

But regardless of the truth or untruth the images depict, they speak to reflect the growing acceptance of pleasure dolls in sexually conservative China.

有網友稱這組照片有炒作之嫌，但不管這組照片背後的故事是什麼，近年來有關充氣/仿真娃娃的話題在國內確是越來越常見。

Wen Jingfeng is the godfather of modern Chinese sex. In 1993, Wen opened China’s first sex shop – Adam and Eve – on Zhao dengyu Road in Beijing. The shop mostly dealt in aphrodisiacs until 2003, when the government removed sex toys from its list of 「controlled medical apparatuses.

文經風被譽為中國現代性用品之父。1993年，他在北京的趙登禹路開了中國第一家性用品/保健品店，名叫「亞當與夏娃」。2003年以前，這家店都只賣性保健用品，包括安全套和一些壯陽藥品。2003年，國家食藥監局發布《國家食品藥品監督管理局關於仿真式性輔助器具不做為醫療器具管理的通知》，從此，性用品脫離了管制。

「That day marked the birth of China’s sex toy market,」 Lin Degang, founder of the sex toy megastore Chun Shuntang wrote in his book Adult Beauty.

「那一天可以說是現代中國性用品行業的生日，」 藺德剛，春水堂的創始人在《成人之美》中寫道。

Guangzhou opened what remains Chinas largest adult products market in 1997. The spacious 3,000-square-meter mall offers almost every kind of sex toy, and most of the vendors also deal in realistic sex dolls.

1997年，廣州開設了中國目前最大的成人用品交易市場。在這個佔地3000平米的商場裡，顧客可以找到各類性用品。

「For cheap things, people usually just shop on Taobao. For more expensive stuff they want to actually see the product,」 one of the shop owners told a writer for Letu Travel. Celebrity look-alike sex dolls with sweet voices are the most popular, he said.

「便宜的東西人們就上淘寶買啦，但是一些更高端更貴的，人們就想看看實物，」一個商戶小販這樣說到。據說，有著明星臉的聲音甜美的娃娃是最受歡迎的。

In 2008, some Chinese media reported that the market capacity reached 100 billion yuan and was growing by 20 percent annually，. As in many such reports in China, the figures were woefully inflated.

2008年，一些國內媒體報導稱，中國性用品市場總值已經達到了1000 億人民幣，並且還在以每年20%的速度增長。但是跟很多國內發布的數據一樣，這個數字難免誇張。

Taobao’s sales records in February 2014 showed that the site sold an average of 200 million yuan in sex products each month. Sdeouthern Weekly estimated that the yearly revenue of Taobao’s sex products is 2.4 billion yuan. Taobao accounts for 80 percent of China’s online sales, making higher numbers especially difficult to imagine.

2014年淘寶發布的數據顯示，淘寶每月售出的性用品大概值2億人民幣。《南方都市報》根據該數據推測稱「很難相信中國情趣用品產業能超過100億。」

Lin said in 2013 that the value of China’s sex products market was 30 billion yuan, adding that the majority of Chinese customers only buy condoms.

藺德剛在2013年也表示，中國的情趣用品市場規模可能只有300億，並且大部分中國人購買的性用品還只限於安全套。

Searching for sex dolls on Taobao reveals around 5,000 items for sale. Price range from 250 yuan for inflatable dolls to more than 10,000 yuan for life-size dolls made of thermoplastic elastomer. In the top tier of sex dolls, customers can customize the doll’s eye color, skin color, hair color, breast size and vaginal depth.

在淘寶上搜索「充氣娃娃」，大概會出現5000多個商品條目，價格從250元到超過1萬元不等。如果訂購高級的娃娃，顧客還可以定製她們的皮膚顏色，頭髮顏色，胸部大小，甚至是陰道長短。

Zhang Han, a MICDOLL (brands name) owner, told Vice UK that there are three reasons people buy sex dolls: 「First, to satisfy a physiological need. Second, to take photos with and share with others. Third, cosplay.」

一個充氣娃娃使用者接受VICE英國採訪時稱，通常人們買充氣娃娃有三個原因，第一是滿足生理需求，第二是為了拍照跟有相同興趣的人分享，第三是cosplay。

Zhongwa.net is China’s largest sex doll forum, and its popular section has more than 290,000 posts. Sex doll users meet there to discuss doll brands and share pictures and their experiences with the dolls.

中娃網是中國最大的充氣娃娃網站之一。用戶在網站論壇上分享他們跟娃娃相處的經驗和照片。

A forum user, Haowangjiao, said he felt sex dolls were much better than real women.

某論壇用戶說，充氣娃娃比真人要好很多。

「I like gentle and obedient girls. I don’t want my girl to be ugly. But the reality is that pretty girls are usually arrogant, have a bad temper and make you waste time trying to please them. They don’t know how to do housework. Those who know how to do housework are usually ugly and fat,」 he wrote.

「我喜歡溫柔聽話的女孩子。我不喜歡太醜的，但是很多漂亮女孩太驕傲脾氣大，得花很長時間哄。她們還不做家務，那些會做家務的長得又不好看。」

It’s hard to say to what extent his views reflect the mainstream. But many young men remain open to using sex dolls. 「There are a lot of ways to meet women unless you have problems with shyness or socializing,」 said a 27-year-old man surnamed Huang.

這在多大程度上反映了主流思想就很難說了。

While the primary use of sex dolls is sex, many middle-aged business owners see dolls as a way to remain faithful. Lin Degang wrote in Adult Beauty about how businessman buy high-end sex dolls to avoid taking a lover or turning to prostitutes while living apart from their spouse.

雖然對很多人來說，充氣娃娃的首要作用是滿足生理需求，但是對一些兩地分居的情侶或者夫妻來說，充氣娃娃卻成為了男性保持忠誠的一個選擇。

A 29-year-old sex doll owner surnamed Liu told Japan Times that he wanted a sex doll because he could only see his wife once a week and the doll could satisfy his needs without cheating on his wife.

Tender Dreams or Bitter Loneliness?

Zhang, the MICDOLL owner, told Vice that his doll could satisfy his most tender dreams and desires. However beautiful that may sound, it’s unlikely that a voluptuous and lifeless sex doll can replicate a human connection.

一個充氣娃娃使用者接受採訪時稱，他的娃娃可以滿足他最柔軟的夢和需求。但是不管聽起來有多美，充氣娃娃卻很難替代現實生活中人與人相處中相互理解，相互扶持所帶來的快感。

While some see sex dolls as toys or tools for avoiding infidelity, sex dolls can also be an emotional crutch for avoiding rejection.

人們使用充氣娃娃的理由千差萬別。對有些人來說，購買充氣娃娃是因為害怕被拒絕。

In the article on Japan Times, Liu said a doll is better than a real woman because it won’t reject or resist, so people can do whatever they want with it.

一個充氣娃娃使用者在接受《Japan Times》採訪時就說到，充氣娃娃比真正的女性好是因為她不會抗拒或拒絕。

A poll conducted on the Zhongwa forum found that only 20 percent of sex doll users say they feel the urge to kiss their dolls while the remaining 80 percent said the dolls were only for sex.

A Taobao sex doll seller said that is common in new sex doll owners. Most people buy a doll for sex, companionship or take photos, but later become more emotionally invested in the doll. A few users buy the doll purely for companionship. One Zhonghua user named Rounima wrote that he only talks to his doll.

而也有男性購買充氣娃娃純粹是為了陪伴。

「I just want to talk to her. I don’t want to have sex with her. I just need someone listen to me,」 Rounima wrote.

「我只想跟她說話。我只想有人聽我說話。」

Many doll users on the forum give their dolls cute names and record details of life with their synthetic partners.

很多用戶會給他們的娃娃取一些很可愛充滿愛意的名字，並且在論壇上詳細記錄與娃娃的生活日常。

Song Bo, a 3D game designer, had the same experience. His doll has become an 「artificial daughter」 he uses to cope with the depression of a cancer diagnosis. The doll, named Xiaodie, is a regular feature in his Internet writings where he explains how he dresses her, paints her nails and brings her to talks.

In an interview with Xinhua, Song said he had spent lots of money on Xiaodie but 「its all worth it, because nothing can beat the satisfaction Xiaodie has brought me.」

Qzyhzf, another Zhongwa forum user, explained why he wanted the doll. 「I am hugely disappointed by women and marriage. My dolls are my spiritual comfort,」 he wrote. 「It’s just too hard to have a beautiful girlfriend,」 wrote Aub, another form user.

Loneliness, fear of rejection and self-doubt seem to be the reasons behind owning a sex doll. And that fear is not limited to Chinese doll owners.

孤獨，害怕被拒絕，自我懷疑，可能是在購買充氣娃娃背後的心理原因。但這種現象並不只出現在中國男性身上。

In 2006, Nick Holt directed the documentary Guys and Dolls in which many sex doll owners said the dolls 「improved」 or even 「saved」 their lives. 「I can tolerate being alone, but not loneliness,」 a 32-year-old man said.

2006年，Nick Holt 導演了一部記錄片「Guys and Dolls」。片中，多個充氣娃娃使用者說到充氣娃娃「提高」甚至「拯救」了他們的生活。「我可以忍受一個人，但是無法忍受寂寞。」一個32歲的受訪者說到。

In his book The Sex Doll: A History, Anthony Ferguson writes 「a sex doll provides a good anatomical representation of a woman for intercourse without the usual prerequisites of social interaction, and without the possibility of rejection. The fear of rejection is significant, especially for the man who is socially awkward.」

Anthony Ferguson 在「The Sex Doll: A History」一書中寫道：「從解刨學上來講，充氣娃娃的功能可以完全替代與一個女性性交，並且這種替代並不需要任何社交前提，也不用擔心被拒絕。對那些並不是很善於社交的人來說，害怕被拒絕在他們的生活中佔著很大一部分。」

While the pain of social rejection is universally acknowledged, the safe option of choosing to hide behind a perfect doll may not be the wisest approach.

正如剛才寫道的，所有人不管是男性還是女性，都會害怕被拒絕。但是不同的人有不同的處理方法，躲在一個有著完美容顏，完美身材的充氣娃娃背後，可能並不是最明智的決策。