1.你不當廚師真是可惜了，添油加醋這麼厲害。
It's a pity that you're not a cook. It's a great addition.
2.不高興的時候、就拿針去超市捅避，孕，套
When not happy, take the needle to the supermarket to avoid, pregnant, set
3.麻雀媽媽問小麻雀：「你想扎什麼髮型？」
小麻雀說：「啾啾」
Mother sparrow asked little sparrow, "what kind of hairstyle do you want?"
Little sparrow said: "chirp"
4.小時候，我是個天才，經過二十多年的教育後，終於成功的被培育成庸才！
When I was a child, I was a genius. After more than 20 years of education, I was finally successfully cultivated into a mediocre!
5.哪有什麼選擇恐懼症，還不是因為窮。
There is no fear of choice, it is not because of poverty.
6.執子之手，方知子醜，淚流滿面，子不走我走。
Holding the hand of the son, we know that the son is ugly, with tears streaming down our face. If the son does not go, I will go.
7.純：屬虛構；亂：是佳人
Pure: fictional; disorderly: beautiful
8.天氣有點有點涼，你想戴什麼顏色的帽子？綠色的挺好看的。
It's a bit cold. What color hat would you like to wear? The green one is very nice.
9.凡夫俗子，你不想嘗嘗本仙女的味道嗎？
Ordinary people, don't you want to taste this fairy?
10.紅豆不長南國，長我臉上了，真相思。
Red beans don't grow in the south. They grow on my face. I really miss you.
11.你有什麼不開心的事，說出來讓大家開心一下。
If you have something unhappy, say it to make everyone happy.
12.昨天看了你一眼，現在眼睛還疼呢。
I took a look at you yesterday, but now my eyes are still sore.
13.天沒降大任於我，照樣苦我心智，勞我筋骨。
Heaven has not given me a great responsibility, so it pains my mind and muscles.
14.理想很豐滿，現實很骨感。
Ideal is full, reality is bony.
15.如果生活不夠甜，那我們就一起吃喝玩樂。
If life is not sweet enough, we'll eat, drink and play together.
16.冰凍三尺非一日之寒，小腹三層非一日之饞。
Rome wasn't built in a day.
圖源網，侵聯刪