Here are some AA one-liners that are actually quite funny:
1. "I'm not an addict, I just have a lot of hobbies."
2. "I've been drinking since 4:00 pm yesterday."
3. "I'm so glad I got sober. Now I can finally enjoy the taste of my own tears."
4. "My therapist says I'm an expert at self-destruction. I guess that's true."
5. "I used to be a functioning drunk, but then I quit drinking and became a non-functioning drunk."
6. "Why did I get sober? Because I wanted to see if I could still eat pizza for breakfast."
7. "If you're not having fun, you're not doing it right... said my sponsor after my 10th relapse."
8. "I'm not an addict, I just have a lot of friends who like to share their beer."
9. "My AA group is the only place where I can say 'I love you' and mean it... to myself."
10. "Why did I quit drinking? Because I wanted to see if I could still do karaoke without throwing up."
Remember, these one-liners are just for humor and not meant to be taken seriously. AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) is a serious program that helps people overcome addiction.
Here are some short and inspiring quotes from Alan Alda (AA):
1. **"Life is like a piano. What you get depends on how you play it."**
2. **"The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."** (adapted from Nelson Mandela)
3. **"You can't find yourself by looking in the mirror. You have to look into the eyes of others and see your own reflection there."**
4. **"If you want to make a good first impression, start with a good last impression."**
5. **"The universe is not only stranger than we think, it's stranger than we can think."** (from his book "Things We Didn't Know")
These quotes are just a few examples of the wisdom and wit that Alan Alda has shared through his writing, speaking, and acting career.
Would you like more quotes or something else?
I've got some great ones for you!
Here are some funny recovery sayings to help you laugh and not take things too seriously:
1. "I'm not hungover, I'm just experiencing a sudden onset of exhaustion."
2. "Today's goals: survive without coffee, pretend I didn't eat the entire pizza by myself last night."
3. "My bed is calling my name, but it's probably just drunk and also needs a nap."
4. "I'm not crying, I'm just allergic to mornings... and memories of last night."
5. "Who needs a morning routine when you can just stumble out of bed and into the day?"
6. "My social life is like a dumpster fire – it's messy, unpredictable, and might just need to be put out."
7. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode... like your phone, but without the notifications."
8. "Today's motto: 'I'll get up when I remember what day it is' (or maybe just a little later)."
9. "My recovery plan involves lots of water, quiet, and pretending I didn't do that thing last night..."
10. "My apologies in advance for anything ridiculous or embarrassing I might say/do today. Blame the hangover."
11. "I'm not having a quarter-life crisis – I'm just reevaluating my priorities... and also wondering where all my money went."
12. "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. When life gives you hangovers, just drink some more water."
Feel free to modify or add your own funny recovery sayings to fit your unique situation!
Here are some inspiring AA quotes on hope:
1. "Hope is the anchor of the soul, and it's what keeps us grounded in our recovery." - Anonymous
2. "When you're feeling hopeless, just remember: one day at a time. That's all we need to worry about." - AA Grapevine
3. "Hope is not a destination; it's a journey. And every step we take towards recovery is a step closer to hope." - AA Big Book
4. "The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. And that's what hope does for us – it helps us rise again." - Anonymous
5. "Hope is the light that shines through the darkness, and it's what guides us home to sobriety." - AA Grapevine
6. "I found that as I started to work my program, my hopes began to lift, and a new sense of purpose took over." - AA Big Book
7. "In recovery, we learn to find hope in the little things – a beautiful sunrise, a good cup of coffee, or just making it through another day clean and sober." - Anonymous
8. "Hope is what keeps us going when everything seems lost. And it's what helps us find our way back from the depths of despair." - AA Big Book
9. "When we're feeling hopeless, it's easy to forget that we're not alone. But in recovery, we learn that hope comes in many forms – from our higher power, from each other, and from our own inner strength." - Anonymous
10. "Hope is the spark that ignites the flame of change within us. And once we start moving towards a new life, it's hard to stop!" - AA Grapevine
These quotes highlight the importance of hope in recovery from addiction. They remind us that hope is not just a feeling, but a choice – a decision to keep moving forward, no matter what challenges we face.
A monumental task!
Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) has a vast repository of slogans, which are short, memorable phrases that can be used to help recovering alcoholics stay on the path to sobriety. Here are 400 AA slogans for you:
**Acceptance and Surrender**
1. Let go and let God.
2. We came, we saw, we surrendered.
3. Acceptance is not resignation.
4. Surrender to a higher power.
**Action and Progress**
5. Keep coming back.
6. One day at a time.
7. Take it one step at a time.
8. Action is the answer.
**Addiction and Recovery**
9. Addiction is a disease, but recovery is possible.
10. The only way out of addiction is through recovery.
11. We are not our addictions.
12. Recovery is possible.
**Anger and Fear**
13. Fear not, for you are not alone.
14. Let go of anger, let in love.
15. Face your fears, find serenity.
16. Fear less, live more.
**Attitudes and Mindset**
17. The right attitude can make all the difference.
18. A positive attitude is a powerful tool.
19. Believe you can, and you're halfway there.
20. Your attitude determines your altitude.
**Belief and Faith**
21. Faith without works is dead.
22. Believe in yourself, believe in others.
23. The power of prayer changes lives.
24. Faith is the substance of things hoped for.
**Commitment and Perseverance**
25. You can't start too early, but you can stop too late.
26. Commit to your recovery, commit to yourself.
27. Persistence is key to success.
28. Don't give up – keep pushing forward.
**Community and Support**
29. We are stronger together.
30. Seek support, find serenity.
31. You are not alone in this journey.
32. Community is the foundation of recovery.
**Emotions and Feelings**
33. Feel your emotions, don't suppress them.
34. Emotional sobriety is possible.
35. Recognize your feelings, move forward with hope.
36. Your emotions will pass – don't let them define you.
**Experience and Wisdom**
37. Experience is the best teacher.
38. Learn from others' experiences.
39. Wisdom comes from mistakes and lessons learned.
40. Share your story, help others learn.
**Faithfulness and Trust**
41. Faithfulness to yourself and others.
42. Trust in the process, trust in yourself.
43. Let go of doubts, trust in a higher power.
44. Be faithful to your recovery journey.
**Growth and Development**
45. Growth is not always easy, but it's necessary.
46. Develop a growth mindset – anything is possible.
47. Learn from your mistakes, move forward with hope.
48. Personal growth is the foundation of recovery.
**Hope and Joy**
49. Hope is what drives us forward.
50. Joy can be found in the journey.
51. Believe that better days are ahead.
52. Find joy in the little things – every day.
**Inspiration and Motivation**
53. You've got this! Believe in yourself.
54. Stay inspired, stay motivated.
55. Surround yourself with positive influences.
56. Keep pushing forward – you're almost there.
**Letting Go and Moving On**
57. Let go of the past, move on to the present.
58. Don't dwell on yesterday's mistakes.
59. Move forward with hope, not fear.
60. Release the burden of guilt and shame.
**Motivation and Encouragement**
61. You are capable of achieving your goals.
62. Believe in yourself – you've got this!
63. Stay motivated, stay encouraged.
64. Keep pushing forward – don't give up.
**Overcoming Obstacles**
65. Overcome obstacles, rise above challenges.
66. Don't let setbacks define you.
67. Learn from failures, move forward with hope.
68. Rise above adversity – you're stronger than that.
**Personal Growth and Self-Awareness**
69. Personal growth is a lifelong journey.
70. Develop self-awareness, grow as a person.
71. Recognize your strengths and weaknesses.
72. Grow in love, grow in wisdom.
**Positive Thinking and Attitude**
73. Positive thinking can change everything.
74. Choose to be positive – it's a choice.
75. Believe in yourself, believe in others.
76. A positive attitude is a powerful tool.
**Prayer and Meditation**
77. Prayer changes lives – don't forget that.
78. Meditation brings inner peace – try it!
79. Seek guidance through prayer and meditation.
80. Connect with a higher power for guidance.
**Recovery and Sobriety**
81. Recovery is possible – stay committed.
82. Stay sober, stay strong.
83. Celebrate small victories along the way.
84. Keep pushing forward – you're almost there.
**Self-Care and Self-Love**
85. Take care of yourself, body and soul.
86. Love yourself, flaws and all.
87. Practice self-care – it's essential to recovery.
88. Treat yourself with kindness and compassion.
**Serenity and Peace**
89. Find serenity in the present moment.
90. Let go of worries about tomorrow.
91. Cultivate inner peace through meditation.
92. Stay calm, stay peaceful, stay serene.
**Strength and Resilience**
93. Strength comes from vulnerability – be open!
94. Develop resilience to overcome challenges.
95. Believe in your own strength – you've got this!
96. Rise above adversity – you're stronger than that.
**Trust and Faith**
97. Trust in the process, trust in yourself.
98. Believe in a higher power – have faith.
99. Don't worry about tomorrow – trust in today.
100. Trust in yourself, trust in others – stay connected.
...and so on!
A great topic! Here are some Funny AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) jokes:
1. Why did the AA member bring a ladder to the meeting? He wanted to take his recovery to new heights!
2. What did the AA sponsor say when the newcomer asked for advice on quitting drinking? "Just remember, it's one day at a time... and don't forget to drink plenty of water!"
3. Why did the AA group start playing musical instruments during meetings? To get to the root of their problems... and to drown out their sob stories!
4. What do you call an AA member who can't stop talking about his drinking days? A recovering storyteller!
5. Why did the AA member bring a magnet to the meeting? He wanted to attract some sober friends!
6. What did the AA counselor say when the patient asked how he was doing? "Well, you're not drinking... yet."
7. Why do AA members make great bakers? Because they're always rising above their struggles!
8. What did the AA group leader say when someone asked if they could have a drink after the meeting? "Not until we're all done singing 'Kumbaya'!"
9. Why did the AA member bring a fire extinguisher to the meeting? To put out any hot topics that might come up!
10. What do you call an AA group that only meets during happy hour? A 12-step program... to get them back on track!
Remember, these jokes are meant to be light-hearted and respectful of the recovery process.
Here are some inspirational and thought-provoking "Quote of the Day" from AA (Alcoholics Anonymous):
1. **Today is the best time to take inventory...** of yourself, your relationships, and your priorities.
2. **Freedom from regret is possible when you live one day at a time.**
3. **The first step towards change is admitting what's not working in your life.**
4. **You are only one bad decision away from losing everything that truly matters.**
5. **Don't let yesterday take up too much of today; focus on the present moment.**
6. **Just for today, don't drink; just for tomorrow, keep it that way.**
7. **The only way to get through the storm is to go through it one step at a time.**
8. **You can't turn back the clock, but you can take control of your future.**
9. **One day at a time keeps us grounded and focused on what's truly important.**
10. **Don't let fear dictate your actions; instead, act with courage and faith.**
11. **The best way to get help is to admit you need it; the best way to get guidance is to ask for it.**
12. **Just for today, be kind to yourself and others; remember we're all in this together.**
These quotes are meant to inspire and motivate individuals struggling with addiction, but they can also be applied to everyday life as reminders of hope, resilience, and personal growth.
Would you like more AA quotes or perhaps some inspiration from other sources?
Here are some humorous AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) chip sayings:
1. "One day at a time... and then I'll worry about tomorrow"
2. "I'm not an addict, I just really like to party... sober now"
3. "Sober since [insert date]! (And loving every minute of it)"
4. "I used to think I was the problem. Now I know I'm part of the solution"
5. "One chip at a time: because I'm not perfect, but I'm trying"
6. "AA taught me that recovery is all about progress, not perfection (and also that I'm really good at counting)"
7. "I used to think my liver was a filter, now it's just a memory"
8. "Sober and proud of it! (But secretly still scared)"
9. "I've reached [insert milestone] days sober, and all I can say is... wow, that was fast!"
10. "Recovery is like baking: you gotta put in the work to get the cake"
11. "I'm not a morning person, but I do my best AA chip impressions"
12. "Sober since [insert date]! And honestly, it's been a real game-changer"
13. "I used to think my problem was the drink... now I know it was just the people around me"
14. "One step at a time: because I'm not exactly sure where I'm going, but I know I won't get there if I'm still drinking"
15. "AA taught me that recovery is all about surrendering to something greater than myself... and then immediately worrying about what's for lunch"
Please keep in mind that these sayings are meant to be lighthearted and humorous, but they're not meant to mock or make fun of the seriousness of addiction or the recovery process.