I am a 「badass」 in love! Because I fell down flat on my face every time I loved!
In this Valentine’s Day, I felt like my heart is broken into pieces again! It is like when I see my own hands bleeding, my breath becomes short, my heart is in a state of constriction, my face becomes whiter, I felt like my strength and spirit are not in my body at this moment, my substance is gone… Now I just want to hide myself under my quilt, grieve and cry.
I shift my consciousness to two perspectives as usual. The wiser me circle around the physical me, see the physical me grieving and really feel the empathy towards the physical me.
I thought a bit in between my depressing emotions, and typed myself these words:
When you feel your heart is broken and hurt, but you created your own reality; you may want to complain, but to complain is manipulation and is making yourself a victim, making yourself a victim is not taking responsibility of your own life; you may cannot forgive others, but in the end you will find out that yourself is the one you need to forgive and un-prison (forgiveness is never about others) ; you may are suffering, but you are suffering on the hands of your own hands; you are suffering because you have not seen how your life has shaped you.
The only job of contrast is to let you know what you do not want, so you have a chance to know what you prefer. Now you get to pick up yourself from where you are, do what you can with what you have and what you know to chase after what you prefer.
But before doing that, validate your own emotions that you felt hurt and sad, allow yourself to live life minute by minute, intentionally find good things in your life that you feel good about and appreciate about (because when you feel appreciation, you do not have access to hurt and sadness vibrationally ), ponder what you need and want and what you have learnt from this experience; really go back to the present moment, when you relive the past, you missed the precious present moment, you lose more if thinking the past is not beneficial.
Life is hard yet the unknown is exciting, clean and raise your vibration little by little, embrace new experience and do not be scared of new experience. When you let go, you opened the window of receiving love simultaneously I think!
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And here is some other wisdom from my spiritual teacher Teal Swan that I want to share with you girls:
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1) Pain is the catalyst for the true alchemy of life change!
Pain is one of the best things can happen to you.
Pain is the indication that you were in the process of expansion, and you are becoming conscious and aware. You are evolving into the life that you were meant for!
Pain has entered your life, so that you can step fully into the life you were meant to live here.
You are becoming self actualized!
2) Take what feels good and beneficial for yourselves!
I should just be looking at the reflection, taking what benefits me, taking note of what doesn't, and it should really be about me not feeling like my reality can be influenced by somebody else, because that's the first mistake we can take. My reality can be influenced by somebody else who is manipulative or who is different than what I think, is an attitude we approach the world with and then we receive nothing but that, we continue to get disappointed with our masters.
3) The more in approval of yourself you are, the more the partner you attract into reality will find approval for you, and that's really what we enjoy: that approval, is pure positive focus! Pure positive focus is the same vibration as love. So love from another person is gonna come as a result of you finding a way to completely approve of yourself exactly the way you are!
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Now I feel better, I feel my spirit is back into my body. Dear Joy, let go of what you cannot control! Keep loving and keep living your greatest potential! Life is still good here, is it?
Author: Joy Yang
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