一、我現在才發現，我還真是個平平無奇的單身小天才呢。
I'm discovering now that I'm a single genius.
二、喂，有人收購閒置的寶貝嗎？你看我怎麼樣？反正我這麼閒著也是閒著。
Hello, anyone buy idle treasure? What do you think of me? I'm idle anyway.
三、為什麼別人都有甜甜的戀愛。而我只有一個怕禿的腦袋。
Why others have sweet love. And I only have a bald head.
四、我的愛情可以晚點到，但是外賣不行。
My love can be late, but not takeout.
五、夏天沒有對象沒關係，但是沒有空調、西瓜、手機不行。
It doesn't matter if there is no object in summer, but there is no air conditioner, watermelon or mobile phone.
六、以後我要對我自己好一點，那些能怪男人的，就決不能怪自己。
In the future, I will treat myself better. Those who can blame men should never blame themselves.
七、國家發貨真是太慢了，為什麼這麼多年了，我的對象還沒送到。
The country delivers goods is really too slow, why so many years, my object has not delivered.
八、大家好，有需要電燈泡的嗎？吃不吃飯不重要，我主要想想近距離看看所謂的愛情。
Anyone need a light bulb? It doesn't matter whether I eat or not. I mainly want to take a closer look at the so-called love.
九、今天熱烈慶祝我結束上半年的單身生活，現在我準備開始下半年的。
Today is a warm celebration of the end of my first half of the single life, now I am ready to start the second half of the year.
十、我是單身小天才，兩手插兜，誰也不愛。
I am a single little genius, hands in the pocket, who also do not love.
十一、單身了這麼多年，你別說是擰瓶蓋了，就算給我消防栓，我都能給他擰開。
Single for so many years, you don't have to twist the cap, even if I give fire hydrant, I can give him to twist off.
十二、未來要和我結婚的那位，我勸你現在少做點對不起我的事情。
The one who is going to marry me in the future, I advise you to do less wrong to me now.
十三、小朋友，你是否有許多的問號，為什麼你單身了這麼久還沒人要。
Little friend, do you have a lot of question marks, why you are single for so long but no one wants.
十四、都說魚和熊掌不可兼得，但是窮和單身卻可以，因為你窮，所以你單身。
They say you can't have your cake and eat it, but you can have your cake and eat it, because you are poor, you are single.
十五、每次去參加別人婚禮的時候，我都在想：到底什麼時候才上菜啊？也不知道這是不是我至今單身的原因。
Every time I go to someone's wedding, I think: When will the food be served? I don't know if that's why I'm single.
十六、有時候還挺羨慕那些舔狗的，至少他們還有對象接近，像我這種只敢看的，應該就叫做眺望狗吧。
Sometimes envy those who lick the dog, at least they have objects close to, like me this only dare to see, should be called overlooking the dog.
十七、看到別人秀恩愛，我就在想：我上輩子是不是得罪了月老，他是不是把我拉進黑名單了，不然為什麼這麼多年對我不聞不問。
To see others show love, I just think: I have sinned against the joking, he is not put me into the blacklist, otherwise why so many years to me.
十八、昨天我夢到我對象跟別人跑了，我在夢裡哭得很傷心，醒來後發現原來我還沒有對象，我就哭得更厲害了。
Yesterday I dreamed that my object ran with others, I cried in the dream very sad, woke up and found that I had no object, I cried more.
會持續更新美文圖片
13個能笑死人的搞笑句子，笑料十足，專治各種不開心
13個扎心的愛情喪句，我從未遺棄愛情，只是愛情拋棄了我