大家鬧過洞房麼……我小時候參加過一些婚禮，婚禮後還會傻不啦嘰地跟著鬧洞房，當時只覺得羞，現在想想，豈一個「汙」字了得。關於鬧洞房，網絡上一些負面新聞也陸陸續續地被報導過。說到這兒，不知道你是不是也和我有著一樣的疑問，為什麼要鬧洞房？鬧洞房「玩」的那些「遊戲」真的只是遊戲那麼簡單麼？還是中國傳統性文化壓抑的結果下，一次肆意妄為的天性釋放？
包貝爾婚禮上的事兒也是鬧得人盡皆知了，對於貴圈發生的事兒，我們旁觀者看個熱鬧也就行了。只不過對於這起事件，我不禁有個疑問：為什麼伴郎團非要撿柳巖扔呢？網絡上罵她slut的不在少數。為什麼？因為她走性感路線？所以行為浪蕩？伴郎團也是這麼想的？所以柳巖活該被扔而且她內心其實是很渴望被扔的？這就是典型的slut shaming邏輯。話不多說，咱還是得學英文的，看段視頻先。
Slut-shaming is the experience of being labeled a sexually out-of-control girl or woman (a 「slut」 or 「ho」) and then being punished socially for possessing this identity. Slut-shaming is sexist because only girls and women are called to task for their sexuality, whether real or imagined; boys and men are congratulated for the exact same behavior. This is the essence of the sexual double standard: Boys will be boys, and girls will be sluts.
Sexist：種族歧視者。這段話對slut-shaming的邏輯做了個解釋，slut-shaming是帶有性別歧視色彩的，女人如果衣著暴露點或者行為在外人看起來有點開放，就會被打上slut的標籤，無論她們是不是真的這樣，They are called to task for their sexuality，她們得為自己與性有關的觀點也好、衣著也好、行為也好受到責備。同樣的事兒擱男人身上，則無可厚非，因為他們是男人。
I (Leora Tanenbaum, author of I Am Not a Slut: Slut-Shaming in the Age of the Internet) have been tracking slut-shaming for two decades. Repeatedly, girls and young women across North America tell me that they are encouraged, even expected, to present themselves as sexually knowing and sophisticated, both online and offline. Being 「hot」 or sexy is part of the recipe of heterosexual femininity. But with one false step, it’s easy to cross the invisible and ever-shifting boundary between 「sexy」 and 「slutty.」 If she is perceived as 「too」 sexy; if she calls too much attention to her sexiness; if she lacks the sprezzatura that is compulsory to pull off the sexy-but-not-slutty performance; she faces a real risk of becoming labeled.
「性感」是展現女性美的一個秘訣，然而性感與浪蕩的界限，卻是難以界定，你說是什麼那就是什麼。如果一個女人太過性感或是不能很好地把握性感與浪蕩的界限，可能麻煩就來了。
In other words, if you are a heterosexual girl or young woman, you are damned if you don’t and damned if you do. If you refrain from any expression of sexiness, you may be written off as irrelevant and unfeminine. But if you follow the guidelines, you run the risk of being judged, shamed and policed.
不禁想起白雲大媽的話，做女人難啊，做名女人更難。你傳統保守，有人說你不夠女人；你性感點，又會有人指指點點說：「這肯定是個biao子」。這裡的irrelevant是缺乏時代性、落後於潮流的意思。我喜歡這個write off的用法，它的意思是勾銷、報廢、沒有任何價值，比如會計衝銷壞帳write off bad debts。這裡的write off好似一桿判官筆，筆落性定，好無奈。Run the risk of ……冒……危險。Police有監督管制的意思，我的理解是，總有幾雙眼睛會時時刻刻地盯著你，對你指指點點。
Acts of slut-shaming are easier than ever to accomplish in the age of social media. Young men can anonymously take photographs of naked, unconscious women with their phones and post the pictures on Facebook without the women’s consent. A university student can blithely and publicly call a 13-year-old girl a 「slut,」 as has happened to the rising talent in baseball, Mo』ne Davis.
Mo』ne Davis是美國冉冉升起的一顆棒球小明星，黑人女孩，迪士尼計劃拍攝一部有關她的電影。得知這個消息後，Bloomburg University的一個男生公開在推特上稱呼她為slut。作者用這個例子其實是想證明，現在管一個女孩子叫slut是件多麼隨意的事兒，更何況Mo』ne Davis並沒有做什麼出格的事兒，她只是優秀而已。再加上網絡媒體的發達，這種傷害會被放大無數倍。blithely：無掛慮地；without one's consent就是未經某人同意的意思；anonymously：匿名地；in the age of 沒啥好說的，注意介詞、有定冠詞。
Slut-shaming is far more harmful than simple name-calling — although being denigrated publicly in itself can be traumatic, as the suicides of a number of slut-shamed girls attests. Once a girl or woman is regarded as a 「slut」 or 「ho,」 she becomes a target for sexual assault. And if she is sexually assaulted, she may be assigned the 「slut」 or 「ho」 identity ex post facto to rationalize the crime and to protect the assaulter.
Being denigrated publicly in itself can be traumatic就是說被誹謗這件事兒本身就是很傷人的。正如一系列自殺事件證實的那樣，attest：證明、證實。be assigned the 「slut」 or 「ho」 identity:就是誰誰誰被定性的意思。 Ex post facto是句拉丁語，意為「事後」。Rationalize the crime：文飾犯罪，-ize後綴的詞，有時間可以我再做一個這種詞合輯的節目（哦天，又許了一個諾，希望可以儘快兌現，請關注）。所以大家看明白了麼？slut shaming的傷害其實是在這裡，一旦一個女人被定性為slut，她們就算受到傷害也會被視作理所當然，就因為她是slut。就好比柳巖一直以性感的一面示人，一旦有人把性感和開放、甚至浪蕩划起等號，那麼柳巖被強行拖進水池這件事兒，在一些人眼裡，責任都在女方了，為什麼，因為她不檢點……
好了，大家有興趣可以去看看Leora Tanenbaum寫的這篇文章The Truth About Slut-Shaming。生活裡發生的事兒都有背後的關聯所在，甚至是錯綜複雜。不管怎樣，八卦可以長壽，大嘿牛樂在其中。
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