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Dear 2Niters,
This morning at 05:32 2NIte’s editorial team has discovered something shocking!
今天早上05:32，2Nite小分隊有個驚人的發現！
This piece of news is a world exclusive! Yes, that’s right! You saw it here first: The UK has voted to leave the EU! We have found out by a secret informant that this is being termed the 「Brexit」. This is a highly complicated issue we will leave other journalists who didn’t succeed working for 2Nite’s editorial team, to analyze.
你可能已經知道了：英國已經投票決定了離開歐洲！我們的秘密情報員發現這被稱為了「脫歐」。這是一件非常複雜的事，具體情況會有很多其他沒能為2Nite工作的人員來分析的。
We, however, will examine the 5 most terrible prospects facing the UK and the EU after the Brexit.
無論如何，我們預測了5件英國脫歐後，英國和歐盟可能會發生的悲劇。
1# FA Premier League level going down
英超水平直線下降
England’s Premier League is the most-watched football league in the world. Some of Europe’s best football players play for English clubs; in fact, during the 2015-2016 season roughly 50% of the league’s best players are nationals of other EU member states. Following the Brexit it’s uncertain what the Premier League will look like given new work permit regulations and a possibly weaker British Pound.
英超是世界上最令人矚目的足球聯賽之一。一些歐洲最好的球員都為英國俱樂部工作。事實上，在2015-2016賽季有大約50%的聯賽最佳球員都來自於其他歐盟成員國。當脫歐之後，我們不確定工作籤證規定是否會有變化，英鎊是否會被貶值。
2# The price of Marmite going up
馬麥醬漲價
For those who don’t know, Marmite is a dark spread made of yeast extract, typically spread on toast or bread. One thing’s for sure for those who』ve tried it (and those who haven’t): you either love the stuff or you hate it (the author belongs to the former group). Imagine if the price of Marmite goes up in EU member states due to import tariffs…Marmite lovers will go to extreme measures to secure lifetime supplies of Marmite resulting in raging crowds causing mass panic in supermarkets.
馬麥醬是一種酵母菌發酵製成的醬，一般被塗在吐司和麵包上。對於那些嘗試過的（以及那些沒嘗試過的）人，要麼極愛，要麼非常厭惡（本人屬於前者）。試想一下如果因為進口問題導致馬麥醬漲價，那些馬麥醬熱愛者會嘗試極端的方式來囤滿一生所需的貨，會導致超市的哄搶和恐慌。
3# Grexit losing its popularity
希臘脫歐擁護者直線下降
Oscar Wilde, Madonna, and many other public figures have stated that 「all publicity is good publicity」.
With all the focus on the Brexit (and maybe other member states 「exits」) , Grexit lost 1st place in this regard. Some Greeks believe that, being a tourism-based economy, less mention of Greece in the news can’t be good with regards to it being mentioned less as an affordable tourist destination.
Oscar Wilde, Madonna,和其他公眾人物都說過「所有的廣告，都是好的廣告」。當所有的目光都集中在英國脫歐時（可能還有其他成員國的「脫歐」），希臘脫歐明顯已經脫離了首要位置。一些希臘人相信，作為一個以旅遊業帶動經濟的國家，如果新聞中沒有足夠對希臘的曝光，對當地旅遊業的關注也會減少。
4# Being laughed at by Americans
被美國人嘲笑
As anyone who has British friends can attest to, many British people like to make a little bit of fun at the expense of Americans (even though seemingly fully embracing American culture, from Britney Spears to supersized burger meals). In the case of the Brexit, many British people have woken up to the prospect of being laughed at by Americans for leaving the EU.
任何有英國朋友的人都可以證明，很多英國人喜歡嘲笑美國人的消費觀（就算看上去他們現在也充滿了美國文化，從布蘭妮斯皮爾斯到超大漢堡套餐）。英國脫歐的決定確認以後，很多英國人都因為被美國人嘲笑離開歐盟而開始醒悟過來。
5# Comedy?
喜劇怎麼辦？
With British comedy shows and series soon not in the EU market any more, where will the remaining EU member states source their comedy from? Germany? That could be a truly terrifying prospect.
英國喜劇和連續劇將會不再屬於歐盟市場，歐盟新的喜劇源頭將會是哪裡呢？德國嗎？細思極恐。
Note: The Brexit and its implications is obviously a serious matter no matter which side people take on it. Apart from Chinese nationals, 2Nite’s team also consists of Europeans of both British and other EU and non-EU European nationality who have varying opinions on the matter. All however agree that Europe is losing its traditional sense of humour for the sake of cynicism.
注意：英國脫歐及其影響是一件非常嚴肅重要的事，無論從哪個角度來看。除了中國人，2Nite編輯小分隊還包含了來自英國，歐盟國家，以及非歐盟國家的歐洲人員，大家都有各自的看法。但大家都同意歐洲正在遺失其嘲諷式的黑色幽默感。
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