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中國獨生子女政策的放寬標誌著單身群體命運的重大轉變。到了適婚年齡的單身族不再被稱為單身貴族。結婚的壓力正式到來。不久單身漢們可能會面臨更壞的消息，比如韓國實施的所謂「單身稅」。
The easing of China’s family planning policy marks a turnaround for thefate of one particular demographic. Singles of marriageable age are no longerrewarded for staying put at that status. The pressures to tie the knot are nowofficial and the foreseeable future may bring worse news, such as the so-called「singles tax」 as adopted in South Korea.
韓國去年出臺新稅制，規定年齡在32至49歲之間且年收入在2000萬至3000萬韓元之間的未婚勞動者，每年需額外繳納約合1000元人民幣的附加稅。這個消息傳到中國後，旅韓的中國同胞還拿此事開玩笑（嚴格來講，這不算是一種稅，只是對單身族取消了其他人享有的一些稅收優惠）。不管怎樣，按中國社交媒體上的說法，這就是變相地「虐單身狗」。
When news from our neighbor reached us a year ago that singles aged 32-49and with a certain income level or above would have to pay the equivalent of1,000 yuan in additional tax, Chinese denizens jokedabout it. (Technically, it was not a tax, but the lack of qualification forsome tax benefits.) Anyway, it was a financial means to 「abuse the single dog」in Chinese social-media parlance.
在中國的文化裡，說某人是「狗」是一種侮辱。但「單身狗」這個流行語的興起主要源於單身族的自嘲。類似的詞還包括「屌絲」和「剩女」，這種詞顯然更輕蔑。單身族自己這麼說也就算了，非單身族這麼說不知道是否會變味，但我還是建議已婚或者有對象的人不要用這些詞。
Now, calling someone a 「dog」 is an insult in Chinese culture. But 「single dog」as a popular meme has been in vogue mainly as aself-deprecating term for this group. Overlapping coinages include 「pubic hair」and 「leftover women」, which are obviously more disparaging. I don’t knowwhether it’s the same as some ethnic slurs used by that ethnicity itself, but Iwould suggest those with spouses or regular dates refrain from the usage.
單身狗總會時不時地因旁人秀恩愛而受到傷害。隨便一張晚上和別人出去玩的照片就可能引起單身狗的嫉妒。更不用說情人節或其他本該情侶間互送禮物、共進晚餐的日子了。單身狗大多時間是一個人，所以他們最顯著的特質就是秒回信息。假設你給十幾個人群發簡訊：「吃一頓去？」，如果有人兩秒內回你：「（去）哪兒（吃）？」，那這個人絕對是條「單身狗」。
Single dogs are hurt by any reminder of peers sharing quality timetogether. An innocuous photo of a night on the town with someone else mightraise the green monster of envy. And forget about Valentine’s Day or anyoccasion when lovers are supposed to buy each other gifts or dinners. Singleshave much time to themselves, so the most salient quality is said to be alightning speed to respond to texting. Suppose you send out 「Wanna grab abite?」 to a dozen people. If you get a 「Where?」 in two seconds, that friend ofyours fits the bill as a card-carrying 「single dog」.
中國的單身族們有這樣的黑色幽默是好事。很多單身狗是拿自己開玩笑，因此不適合在本報刊登。下面的對話也許可以打個擦邊球：
Good thing China’s bachelors and bachelorettes have developed a gallowshumor. Many of the jokes are at their own expense and not fit for print on thisnewspaper. The following conversation could be a borderline case:
單身男：「我妻子病了（經濟不景氣），我很難受。」
Bachelor: 「I don’t feel good because my wife is ill.」
單身女：「我更難受。我老公（股市）崩（盤）了。你老婆怎麼了？」
Bachelorette: 「I’m even worse because my hubby has come down. Whathappened to her?」
單身男：「她緊縮（通貨緊縮）了。你老公呢？」
Bachelor: 「She’s deflated. And yours?」
單身女：「漏電了。」
Bachelorette: 「A power leak.」
到目前為止，所有未婚的人所承受的社會壓力都是來自於家庭和朋友。農曆新年一到，所有回家探親的小單身狗們都勢必會受到年紀越來越大的父母無休止的嘮叨，以及連孩子都已經上小學的髮小帶來的打擊。但先別絕望。這些都不算最糟糕的。
So far, social pressure for those available for the institution comes fromfamily and friends. Come Lunar New Year, all the little puppies on home visitswould be hammered with non-stop nagging from ageing parents and childhoodfriends whose children are already in grade school. But don’t despair. It couldhave been worse.
2015年上映的歐洲黑色喜劇片《龍蝦》描繪了一個反烏託邦的未來社會。在那裡，單身的人會被送進一家「酒店」進行45天的「治療」。如果在「治療」期間沒有找到匹配的伴侶，他們將被變成一種自己想變成的動物。主人公因為龍蝦壽命長而選擇變成龍蝦。該電影也以此命名。
The 2015 European black comedy The Lobster is about an Orvillian future inwhich singles are put away in a hotel and given 45 days to find a romanticpartner. If they fail, they are turned into an animal of their own choosing.The protagonist chooses the lobster for its longevity, hence the title.
看了這部電影，我都可以想像到單身族會如何做出回擊，捍衛婚姻自主權，並把婚姻描繪得如何墮落了。
Now I can imagine abacklash when singles fight for their rights to be on their own and marriage isdepicted as corrupting.