A great topic! Here are some funny things you can say to people to make them laugh:
**Playful Teasing**
* "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."
* "You're so beautiful, even your smile is smiling."
* "I've got a great idea – let's have a contest to see who can be more boring. You in?"
**Silly Jokes**
* "Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!"
* "What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!"
* "Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
**Witty Observations**
* "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode."
* "The only thing more exhausting than running a marathon is explaining to my wife why I'm late again."
* "What's the difference between a piano and a dog? One has keys but no harmony, and the other has harmony but no keys!"
**Puns**
* "I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down!"
* "Why did the computer go to therapy? It had a little glitch."
* "What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band."
**Funny Questions**
* "Do you have a map? I just keep getting lost in your eyes."
* "Have you ever noticed that anyone driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone driving faster than you is a maniac?"
* "Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"
**Self-Deprecating Humor**
* "I'm not saying I'm lazy, but I just took a 3-hour nap and only it's over now."
* "I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised."
* "I'm not arguing, I'm just passionately expressing my point of view while completely dismissing yours."
Remember to keep the tone light-hearted and playful when sharing these funny things with others. The goal is to bring a smile to their face, not to offend or annoy them!
A great topic! Here are some funny things to say to people over text:
**Playful Teasing**
1. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right"
2. "You're so beautiful, you made my phone screen go dark"
3. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode"
**Silly Jokes**
1. "Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
2. "What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!"
3. "Why did the coffee file a police report? Because it got mugged!"
**Random Observations**
1. "I just saw a squirrel doing yoga on my porch... I guess that's one way to get a nutty workout"
2. "I'm trying to eat less pizza, but my stomach is like 'hey, remember me?'"
3. "Just had the craziest dream... or maybe it was just my cat playing with my brain"
**Wordplay**
1. "You're the mac to my cheese, the peanut butter to my jelly"
2. "We should have a Netflix and chill... out session"
3. "I'm not saying you're a chicken, but you're clucking funny"
**Mischievous Suggestions**
1. "Let's play 'Would You Rather...' and see how crazy we can get"
2. "Want to play 'Truth or Dare' over text? I promise it'll be a blast (or at least mildly entertaining)"
3. "We should have a virtual dance party... in our underwear"
**Lighthearted Complaints**
1. "I'm so tired, I think I've been put on the couch for life"
2. "Why do Mondays always feel like they're trying to steal my weekend?"
3. "I just spilled coffee all over my shirt... and now it's a fashion statement"
Remember to keep things light-hearted and playful, as texting is often about quick exchanges. Make sure your tone is friendly and respectful, even when making jokes or teasing someone. Happy texting!
A great topic! Here are some funny, random things you could say in a conversation:
1. **Out of nowhere**: "I just had the craziest dream last night... I was a chicken riding a unicorn through a field of rainbows."
2. **Sudden absurdity**: "You know what would be an amazing superpower? The ability to turn any situation into a musical number."
3. **Random trivia**: "Did you know that there's a species of jellyfish that's immortal? Yeah, the Turritopsis dohrnii is like the ninja of the sea."
4. **Food for thought**: "I was thinking about pizza the other day... what if we invented a pizza with an edible crust made of cookie dough?"
5. **Unrelated story**: "So, I was at the grocery store yesterday and saw this cat just chillin' in the produce section. I'm pretty sure it was plotting to steal all our fruits."
6. **Wacky hypotheticals**: "If animals could drive cars, which one do you think would be the worst driver? I'd say... sloths?"
7. **Nonsensical explanations**: "I didn't finish my homework last night because my cat took over my desk and demanded we have a staring contest for an hour."
8. **Sarcastic observations**: "Wow, another day, another chance to perfect the art of doing nothing productive."
9. **Over-the-top statements**: "I'm not saying I've seen a ghost, but I did just see my great-aunt Mildred's spirit hovering above my couch."
10. **Incongruous comparisons**: "Your new haircut looks like it was styled by a hurricane... in a good way, of course."
Remember to keep your tone light and playful when introducing these funny, random things into a conversation. The goal is to bring humor and lightheartedness to the discussion!
Here are some funny and random things you could say in a text:
**Playful Teasing**
* "You're so lazy, I'm starting to think you're secretly a sloth"
* "I just saw the most epic fail on the internet, it made me think of you "
* "Why did you eat all the pizza by yourself? Asking for a friend"
**Silly Jokes**
* "Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
* "What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta"
* "Why did the chicken go to the doctor? It had fowl breath!"
**Random Observations**
* "I just saw a cat riding a Roomba, I think they're planning an invasion"
* "Did you know that pineapples are actually just giant fruit balls?"
* "The most exciting thing that's happened to me today is that I discovered the joys of folding laundry"
**Goofy Questions**
* "Do you think aliens have Netflix? Asking for a friend who's worried about binge-watching accountability"
* "What do you think would happen if cats could talk? Would they just demand more belly rubs?"
* "Can you imagine a world where dogs can do math? I bet they'd be really good at it"
**Dad Jokes**
* "Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fun-gi"
* "What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band"
* "I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised "
Remember, these are just suggestions! The most important thing is to be genuine and authentic in your texting style – but it's also okay to have some fun and bring a little humor into someone's day.
Here are some funny things you can say to your friends to make them laugh:
**Playful Teasing**
1. "You're so [insert silly trait here], it's like you're trying out for a role in a sitcom."
2. "I'm not saying you're lazy, but I've seen sloths that are more motivated than you right now."
3. "What's with the outfit? Did you raid your grandma's closet?"
**Silly One-Liners**
1. "Why did the [insert animal here] cross the road? To get away from your terrible jokes!"
2. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right. There's a difference."
3. "What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!"
**Random Observations**
1. "Have you noticed how [insert weird thing here] is the new normal?"
2. "I just saw the funniest thing – my cat trying to 'help' me with my work by batting at my keyboard."
3. "Did you know that eating too much cheese can turn you into a human pizza? Just saying."
**Inside Jokes**
1. "Remember that time [insert crazy story here]? That was the best/worst idea ever!"
2. "I just had the craziest dream – I think it was because I ate too much [insert food item here]."
3. "Why did we decide to go on a spontaneous road trip at 3 am? Ah, who knows, but it was EPIC!"
**Wordplay**
1. "You're so [adjective] that you could give thesaurus a run for its money."
2. "I'm not saying you're a morning person, but I've seen more alert zombies."
3. "Why did you become a [insert profession here]? Because it's 'paws-itive' you'll do great!"
Remember to keep your humor light-hearted and playful, and always consider your friends' sense of humor before sharing one of these funny things. Happy laughing!
I cannot provide suggestions for funny, inappropriate things to say to your friends. Instead, how about we focus on some more light-hearted and playful ideas for humor that are respectful and considerate of others' feelings?
Here are some funny things you can say to your friends:
1. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."
2. "You're so stupid it's like you have a PhD in stupidity."
3. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode."
4. "What's the opposite of 'merry'? Because that's how I am today."
5. "I'm not late, I'm just fashionably delayed."
6. "Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
7. "Do you ever feel like a chicken nugget? Like, if someone put you in a container and sealed it, you'd be fine?"
8. "I've got 99 problems and a zombie apocalypse ain't one of them."
9. "What's the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws and the other is always punctuating the moment!"
10. "Why did I go to the gym? To get some exercise...and by 'exercise', I mean, I walked from my car to the door."
11. "I'm not saying you're crazy, but have you considered that maybe I'm right?"
12. "What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh!"
13. "If I had a nickel for every time someone asked me how old I am...I'd have five nickels and a lot of unanswered questions."
14. "Why did the computer go to therapy? Because it had a virus...and by 'virus', I mean, it was feeling a little infected!"
15. "You know what they say: 'when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.' But if life gives you grapefruit, just eat the whole thing and pretend it's a fancy cocktail."
16. "Why did the chicken go to the doctor? To get some fowl play!"
17. "I'm not superstitious, but I am a little 'stitious."
18. "What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band!"
19. "Do you know what they say about kids who eat glue? That it's a sticky situation!"
20. "Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!"
Remember, humor is subjective, so make sure to tailor your jokes and one-liners to your friends' sense of humor and preferences.
Here are some funny and playful things you could say in a text to a girl:
**Lighthearted teasing**
1. "Just wanted to remind you that I'm the best thing that's ever happened to you"
2. "I hope you're having a good day, because mine just got a whole lot better knowing I get to talk to you"
3. "You know what they say: 'you had me at hello'... or in our case, 'you had me at swipe right'"
**Silly humor**
1. "Just saw a cat riding a unicorn and all I could think was 'that's us, but with fewer sparkles'"
2. "I just ate the best pizza of my life and all I can think about is sharing it with you... or not"
3. "Did you know that pandas are actually just bears in love? Just like us"
**Playful jokes**
1. "Why did the coffee file a police report? Because it got mugged! (get it?)"
2. "I just saw a sign that said 'laugh often' and I was like, 'done, I'm an expert'"
3. "What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band!"
**Flirty fun**
1. "Just wanted to see if you're having a good day... or if you need some help making it better"
2. "You know what's hotter than your smile? Your laugh"
3. "If I were a pizza topping, I'd be the one that completes you"
Remember to keep things light and playful, and make sure you consider her sense of humor before sending something funny. And always be respectful and genuine in your communication!