今天解析的內容選自2020年天津大學MTI翻譯真題。現在來看看每一句的翻譯,以及翻譯的過程中可能出現的問題。很多人愛喝茶,卻不知道如何辨別茶葉的好壞,於是評茶師應運而生。如果把茶葉比作姑娘,那麼評茶師就像是一位嚴格的選美官。評茶師一般會從外形與氣質入手,用一系列標準給每一款茶打分。撲面而來的茶香,沁人心脾的味道,在評茶師眼裡卻大不相同。很多人愛喝茶,卻不知道如何辨別茶葉的好壞,於是評茶師應運而生。前兩句可以輕鬆合併為一個小句,讓「很多人」做主語。Many people love tea,butthey don’t know how to distinguish the good from the bad, sotea evaluators arose come into existence.這是run-on sentence,幾乎每期都會有同學出現這個問題,是錯誤的。大家要小心。我們都知道英語句子應當有一套獨立的主謂賓,用並列連詞或從屬連詞可以連接兩套及以上的主謂賓。但是句子能容納的主謂賓也是有限度的,不能多個連詞連同多個主謂賓放在一個句子裡。這是英文句子的「
不能承受之重」。上面的錯誤句子就錯在,用了but(表示轉折)和so(表示因果)兩個並列連詞,語法上是不允許的。可以改用其他語法形式來表達,我用了非限制性定語從句,用which指代前面兩句話的內容。Many people love tea, but few know how to distinguish the good from the bad, thus tea tasters emerge.譯文主幹是:Many people ..., but few ..., thus tea tasters ....thus是副詞,不能連接兩個句子,之前遇見過的meanwhile, therefore, however等副詞同樣不能連接句子。所以最後的tea tasters emerge在句中就很尷尬,沒有連詞連接,語法上和主幹扯不上關係。所以官方譯文是不合適的。* thus: adv. as a result or consequence of this; therefore 因此,從而如果不考慮具體選詞,只從語法角度說,這句話這麼改就對了:Many people ..., but few know ..., thus generating tea tasters.Burke knocked out Byrne, thus becoming champion. 伯克擊倒了伯恩,因此成為冠軍。2.應運而生,實際意思是「使……產生」,可以用bring forth。* bring forth: (phrasal verb) literary to produce something or make it appear使產生,使出現;生產* taster: n. someone whose job is to test the quality of foods, teas, wines etc by tasting them 品嘗家,試味專家有同學在「評茶師」前增補了名詞profession一詞,因為理解起來是「評茶師這一職業」應運而生的。這個思路有合理之處,只是在英文中說「人(評茶師)」是「職業」就不太搭配。* profession: n. a job that needs a high level of education and training 〔需要高等教育和訓練的〕專業,行業看詞典對profession的解釋,是個job,就更能確定不能說「人」是「工作」了。Many people love drinking tea, yet they do not know how to tell the quality of tea-leaves, which brings forth tea tasters.Many people love tea, but few know how to distinguish the good from the bad, thus tea tasters emerge. (×)如果把茶葉比作姑娘,那麼評茶師就像是一位嚴格的選美官。1.本句話的重點在於,要注意保持名詞數的一致性,以及主謂一致。有的同學把「姑娘」處理成了單數的a girl。如果不看後面,那是說得通的,用不定冠詞a修飾girl來表示泛指的「姑娘」這個群體。可後面出現了「選美官」,那麼選美官的選擇對象肯定是多個「姑娘」,所以girl要用複數更好。主謂一致就是最基本的了,主語是第三人稱單數的時候,謂語動詞要用單三形式。the tea taster are a strict judge (×)這個問題在隨便一個句子中都會遇到,只是本句話中出現的頻率是最高的,大家要小心。遇見中文無主句時,要適時增補主語,這個在《政府工作報告》中非常常見。原文的「如果把……比作……」中沒有主語,但譯文不能直接寫:If comparing/likening ... to ..., (×)if是從屬連接詞,後面要跟從句。既然是從句,那麼也得有從句的主謂賓。就是說,去掉if以後依然有完整的句子成分才對。上面的句子沒有主語;謂語動詞也是非謂語形式。從句部分整個站不起來,是嚴重的語法錯誤。3.原文的「比作」和「就像是」均為明喻,就是明擺著的比喻,要保留「比作」和「像」的字眼。譯文也要如此,直接譯為「就是」就不太合適了:the tea taster are a strict judge (×)要說a tea taster is like a strict judge (√)4.把……比作……:compare ... to ...* compare: VERB 動詞把…比作 If you compare one person or thing to another, you say that they are like the other person or thing.compare ... with ...和compare ... to ...辨析:嚴格地說,compare...with...是「把……跟……比較」,compare...to...是「把……比作……看待」,如He compares me with my brother 和 We may well compare the little girl to a kitten。習慣上在該用 with 的場合英美人也往往用 to,但似乎沒有在該用 to 的場合用 with 的。comparable 後面接 with 或 to 跟 compare 相同。If we compare tea to girls, tea tasters are like strict judges in a beauty contest.If we compare tea to a young girl, then the tea taster is just like a demanding judge of beauties.評茶師一般會從外形與氣質入手,用一系列標準給每一款茶打分。我們在翻譯時也要注意主要信息和次要信息的位置,要儘量讓主要信息放在句子主幹中,次要信息則可以放在「定狀補」等語法成分中。在本句中,「一般從……入手」和「用……標準」都是「打分」的角度或手段,是次要信息,所以要放在從句或狀語中,「打分」這件事要放在主句中。They judge the tea from its appearance and temperament, with a series of standards to score every type of tea.They generally start with its appearance and temperament, using a series of standards to score each type of tea.2.* appearance: n. WAY SB/STH LOOKS 外表 [countable, uncountable] the way someone or something looks to other people 外表;外觀3.* temperament: n. the emotional part of someone’s character, especially how likely they are to be happy, angry etc 氣質,性情,性格,稟性4.* grade: V-T If something is graded, its quality is judged, and it is often given a number or a name that indicates how good or bad it is. 將…分等級; 給…評分* score: GIVE POINTS 評分[transitive] to give a particular number of points in a game, competition, test, or experiment 〔在比賽、考試或實驗中〕給…評分,給…打分然後,在這個語境下,「茶」代表一種事物,是不可數的,不能說「一個茶、兩個茶」,所以不能直接寫:這種情況是很常見的,比如「水」不可數,但是用上cup就可以量化了:They start with the appearance and temperament, and grade each type of tea with a series of standards.Starting with the appearance and temperament, they grade each type of tea with a series of standards.Generally, they grade every type of tea in accordance with a series of criteria based on its appearance and temperament.
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