翻譯和寫作總感覺自己的英文句子很深生硬?是為什麼?今天我們來談一談漢譯英中邏輯詞和語序調整。
首先,水位上升會威脅到沿海和島嶼國家的居民。另外,一旦海洋不再能夠履行一直以來的氣候調節功能,我們就會面臨著更令人擔心的系統性風險。這一段大家會如何翻譯呢?
First, the rise of sea level will threaten people living in the coastal areas and on islands. Second, when the ocean can no longer perform its function of regulating the climate, we will face systematic risk which is even more worrisome.
這樣翻譯語言更多還是被中文字面限制了,基本順著原文語序翻譯,雖然沒有太多語法錯誤,但是很難在CATTI和MTI考試中脫引而出,拿到高分。那麼從語序和邏輯銜接的角度,怎麼樣做的更好呢?
一般來講,英語多前重心,漢語多後重心。在表達多邏輯思維時,英語更傾向是判斷或結論等在前,事實或描寫等在後,即重心在前;漢語則是由因到果、由假設到推論、由事實到結論,即重心在後。英語和漢語的重心在句中的位置有時是不一樣的,翻譯的時候如果不進行調整,可能會給表達造成很大的困難。只有了解這些區別,才能對英譯漢有正確的認識,才能在翻譯中抓住重點,找到解決問題的辦法.
漢譯英時,語序不做任何改動,不說一定翻譯錯誤,但是至少是不夠地道的。上面原文的第二句話,按照重要程度的關係來排列一下(最重要的放在最前面):
我們會面臨系統性的風險(這更令人擔心)-一旦海洋無法履行功能(調節氣候的功能)。
There is of course the rise in water levels which will threaten communities settled along the coasts and island States. There is also a risk that is even more worrying since it is systemic, and which will become a reality if the oceans are no longer able to perform the climate regulation function that they have long fulfilled.
對比母語原文,大家會發現語序和邏輯銜接靈活了很多。「首先」和「另外」沒有翻譯成,「first","second",而是用」of course"和「also"表達了」程度遞進「關係。
在第二句話的處理上,注意到了」更令人擔心「和」系統性風險「之間的因果關聯;此外,用」which will become a realy「來表示」一旦「和」就要「的」強調語氣「。
所以如果英文要翻譯的更加出彩,寫作語言銜接更符合母語習慣,大家就不要滿足於」字對字「,」順著翻「,這樣久了會陷入瓶頸,慢慢地開始機械化的翻譯。
尤其對於中文為母語的譯者而言,平時一定要多多注意語言邏輯和語序的必要調整。邏輯連接詞很容易被忽略,因為可能原文就沒有清晰地指出內容間的邏輯聯繫,漢語自身的「意合」特點讓中國人不藉助連接詞也能感受到語言的邏輯變化。但對於英語母語者,也就是漢譯英作品的目標讀者來說,文字裡的邏輯連接需要清晰直白。
接下來,我們再通過1個例子來感受一下邏輯連接詞的重要性。
如今挑戰依然嚴峻,仍有8億多飢餓人口,國際糧食貿易面臨著保護主義和單邊主義的幹擾,不穩定因素增加,實現相關可持續發展目標任重道遠。
譯文:
Many challenges persist: more than 800 million people are still suffering from starvation; international food trade is threatened by protectionism and unilateralism, instability rises. And, lot of work remains to be done to achieve sustainable development.
修改後的譯文:
Many challenges persist: more than 800 million people are still suffering from starvation; protectionism and unilateralism rises, bringing instability to international food trade. Thus, lot of work remains to be done to achieve sustainable development.
原文中連續的逗號非常具有迷惑性,讓人覺得後面的幾個分句都只是並列的成分,然而只有「仍有8億多飢餓人口,國際糧食貿易面臨著保護主義和單邊主義的幹擾」是對前面「挑戰」的列舉。「不穩定因素增加」實際上是「保護主義和單邊主義」帶來的結果,而最後的「實現相關可持續發展目標任重道遠」是對前面所有內容的總結。
接下來,和大家補充一下,因為常見邏輯關係表達方式:
1. 表示原因
直接表達
because (of), therein, due∕owing∕thanks to, by reason of , as a result∕consequence of = inconsequence of, on ground of∕that(強調主觀理由)= out of = for the sake of,as,since =for,now∕in that
間接表達,也是大家容易忽視的用法。
be responsible for, be attributed∕contributed to (原因是)= =seeing∕considering∕given (that)= on account of =on this account = = in (the)light of = in view of (the fact that)= by∕in virtue of = put sth down to sth(把……歸因於……)
很多時候,在表達「因果」關係時,不一定就要用"because","as","since"等直接因果關係表達,有時候也可以試試間接「因果」表達,和大家分享一些比較好的例句:
Who is responsible for climate change.(What is the cause of the climate change)
Rising temperature is contributing to the melting glaciers. (Rising temperature is causing ……)
Considering/in view of/seeing the impact of global warming on the earth, efforts should be made to control CO2 emission.
所以大家以後在翻譯或者寫作中,表達「原因」時,想想,如何用「間接」因果表達哦。
2. 表示結果
直接表達
So = hence =therefore= therefor = thereby = thereof = thereout = therewithal = thereupon = thus = consequent(ly)= result (ing) =consequence =in consequence = as a result∕consequence = result in
間接表達
give rise to = lead to = arouse = agitate =awaken = fire up = provoke = spark = spur =stimulate = stir (激起,引起,引發,激發)= trigger = activate = prompt =set in motion = bring about ∕on =present =turns out that…
例句,如下:
Overdosage may give rise to the following signs and symptoms.
The scandal has aroused public outrage.
The new US administration has threatened additional tariffs and other measures and provoked frequent economic and trade friction with its major trading partners.
3 表示轉折
① Instead (of)= rather than (是……)而不是
② But = yet = although =though = while = whereas = when = only = (but)rather = instead =still = nevertheless = nonetheless = much as(用於句首) 儘管如此,然而,雖然,但是
③ Otherwise = or else 否則,要不然
④ In effect ∕fact ∕reality = indeed = virtually 實際上,事實上,的確
【注】although,though,while,whereas,to be sure,in effect∕fact,indeed既表示讓步,又表示轉折。
4 表示條件
① if = providing ∕provided∕suppose∕supposing that 如果,假如
② in case of = in theevent of 萬一……
③ failing 如果不能,如果沒有
④ but for ∕that 要不是,若非(主句用虛擬語氣)
⑤ unless 除非
⑥ as long as = onlyif 只要
⑦ on condition that … 條件是……
⑧ if only 但願,要是……就好了(常與虛擬語氣連用)
⑨ only if 必須在……的條件下(引導條件狀語從句)
5 表示目的
① For fear of = lest 以免,以防
② For the sake of … = in the desire to do sth 為了……
③ in order to
【注】for the sake of 既表示原因,又表示目的。
最後,大家今年如果要備考MTI和CATTI,讀完這篇文章,一定要記得調整一下自己翻譯練習的思路。多思考,少死記。如果想高效備考,也歡迎大家私信Jacky,了解一下咱們的「MTI和CATTI衝刺線上小班」哦!學習效果真是槓槓的!記得掃碼添加Jacky,進行1對1翻譯譯測試與反饋」,備註「諮詢」。