17種噁心到吐的社交網絡更新(雙語)

以下是17種讓人噁心到吐的社交網絡更新，來看看你「中槍」了嗎？

 

1. Declarations of love that don’t ever need to declare: 「I love my daughter sooo much.

沒必要的愛的宣告：「我好愛我的女兒啊。」

Analysis: They feel the need to convince someone like themselves, or perhaps felt a pang of love and instead of telling the beloved, they felt the whole world should be in on it. Once, a friend of mine posted, 「I hate my kid. Sorry to offend you, but he’s a little bastard and I’m sick of him.」 Obviously it was a joke, but 141 people felt the need to tell him what a bad parent he was.

分析：這些人是不是覺得非得讓別人知道自己有多喜歡誰，他們可能覺得堅守這份愛有些苦悶，你倒是告訴你愛的人啊，滿世界嚷嚷算什麼意思啊？有一次我的朋友發了這樣一篇：「我討厭我孩子，如果讓你不爽我很抱歉，但他真的是個小混蛋，我太討厭他了。」很明顯他開個玩笑罷了，不過141個傢伙在下面留言說他實在是個不稱職的父親……

 

 

2. Mundane details about their day appearing as milestones: 「Going to dinner and a movie!!!」

普普通通的生活細節，非要當成裡程碑一樣的大事：「去吃了晚飯，還看了電影！！！」

Analysis: A very boring life.

分析：這樣的日子真無聊。

 

 

3. Giving details about health along with emoticon to verify feelings about it: 「Feeling sick today :("

發身體情況的細節，還要加個表情符號證實自己說的沒錯：「今天感覺病怏怏的:(」

Analysis: Bored, and too stupid to just play Words with Friends.

分析：這人也被無聊逼的，和朋友玩文字遊戲你都不夠格，你這個蠢貨。

 

 

4. Emotional rant directed at no one in particular, but so specific that everyone knows they』ve been screwed over: 「Never trust people who tell you they will pick you up at 6 just to make you wait an hour. Some people will never be mature enough to be in a relationship, so maybe they should be dumped.」

情緒激動的怒罵，看似不針對某人，其實大家都知道他倆完了：「永遠別相信一個說6點鐘來接你，結果讓你苦等了1個小時的傢伙。有些人永遠沒辦法像成熟的人一樣談戀愛，也許他們活該被甩。」

Analysis: Well, they can’t really give the person’s name or address them directly. That would be too honest.

分析：咳，這人就是不指名道姓，也不該當著對方的面直接說。

 

 

5. Pictures of feet.

拍腳的照片

Analysis: I have no idea why people do this. It’s weird.

分析：我不知道為什麼有人要這麼做。太奇怪了。

 

 

6. Pictures of mundane plates of food in front of them.

一盤擺在面前普普通通的菜

Analysis: "I’m eating. You have to see what I’m eating!" Well, maybe it looked better at the restaurant.

分析：「我在吃飯噠，你要看我在吃嬸Mua!」沒準餐館裡的真貨要比你拍的還好看些。