Flying high in the Mile High Club

2021-02-28 PandaGuides

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It’s arguably the most common sexual fantasy shared by men and women. When I was in grade school I knew what the Mile High Club (MHC) was, even before I fully understood what sex was or even heard of a STD/STI.

To ensure we are all on the same page, the Mile High Club is having sex at least one mile, 1.6km, in the air while on an airplane.

I say it is the most common fantasy because according to a 2011 survey by Skyscanner, a popular online portal to compare and buy travel arrangements, 95% of respondents said they want to join the MHC. The same survey of 1,000 travelers found only 20% have actually given the high-altitude act a try. http://www.skyscanner.net/news/planes-are-new-hotspot-romantic-liaison

 

Another study done by a similar online ticketing site in the UK found that a surprising 21% of 718 British flight attendants had intercourse with a colleague inflight, an additional 14% said they had hooked up with a passenger in flight. In total, that’s a remarkable 35% of cabin crew who have done the dirty midair. Your prospects of joining the club are looking up, eh? http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/aviation/12181955/Airline-cabin-crew-reveal-their-guilty-secrets-from-sex-in-the-sky-to-short-changing-passengers.html

For most, the idea of having sex midair is simply an item on the bucket list to check off, or a cool story you can tell your friends over a beer, and that desire has somehow been ingrained in us since almost the birth of flight.

The Godfather of the MHC

The Wright Brothers are credited with the first powered flight ever in 1903. Their first flight lasted a mere 59 seconds and was hardly a setting for coitus. Obviously. 


It wouldn’t be until 11 years later that an invention made the thought of getting busy in flight possible: autopilot. The inventor’s name was Lawrence Burst Sperry (no, I didn’t make that up). Being a playboy it took him less than two years to put the autopilot prototype to work. 

 

In 1916, Sperry and a woman named Waldo Pierce had to be rescued just off the coast of New York after their plane crashed in the water. Both were butt naked. Of course, Sperry attempted to explain their peculiar situation by saying the crash had ripped their clothes off- but the truth was evident. A tabloid at the time published a story on the event titled, 「Aerial Petting Leads to Wetting.」 

Sperry and Pierce, credited as being the first members of the Mile High Club

Catch me if you can

If you’re ready to be part of the 20% and check the MHC off your bucket list here are some tips. To be clear: I’m not encouraging or condoning this act because, after all, it is sex in a public place. Think of this as sexual education- I’m not telling you to have sex on an airplane, but if you do here’s how:

• Aim to do it during a long haul flight. This is a no-brainer. Longer flights, especially international ones, can give you plenty of time to build up your nerve and wait for the perfect time. In addition, a lot of international flights are overnight. People eat, maybe have a drink, then drift off to sleep, giving you the perfect opportunity to sneak off to the bathroom-or, if you’re really daring (and quiet), take care of things in your seat.

• Skip to the loo. Despite not being a very romantic setting, it’s the most common place to have sex on a plane. Mile high veterans say you should opt for the handicapped bathroom because it has extra room and a rail to hold onto. Just keep in mind, the crew has the ability to unlock the door if they need to. And if you’re worried about the cleanliness of the bathroom remember; it’s not the dirtiest place on a plane.

• Timing is everything. The last thing you want is to get caught mid-stroke. To avoid this, time your special visit to the loo when the seatbelt sign is on and the cabin crew are seated. Another prime opportunity is when the crew is servicing the plane (ie. distributing drinks/food with a cart at the other end of the plane).

• If your partner is British, then you’re ahead of the game. Another survey from Skyscanner of 700 cabin crew members found Brits lead the way in MHC memberships. The normally buttoned-up-Brits are followed by Australians, Germans, French, and Brazilians. 

If you’re expecting a life changing mile high experience here’s a disclaimer from TravelandLeisure.com, 「Everything is dull at altitude; your sense of taste, smell, everything. If you’re expecting an earth-shattering big bang, it’s not going to happen.」

On the flipside, a book called The Joy of Sex by Alex Comfort gives a slightly different idea of what having sex at 30,000 feet feels like. Comfort says that lower atmospheric pressure increases the intensity of orgasm. The idea behind this is the same reason why some people participate in autoerotic asphyxiation; less oxygen results in a better orgasm. Another reason is the vibrations of the plane heightens arousal.  

…and if you get caught? 

Play it cool. Most of the time when flight attendants catch someone in the middle of the act they simply want to stop the act without causing a scene or letting the whole plane know what’s going down in the lavatory. Though there are some instances, participants getting arrested is a rarity. As long as you don’t try to fight someone or expose yourself to a bunch of passengers (or kids!) you will probably avoid arrest. A discussion on Reddit (which is, admittedly, hardly a scientific evaluation) exposed that 65% of flight attendants would let the act slide as long as the couple is discreet about it. https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/166gff/flight_attendants_of_reddit_upon_discovering_a/

With all of that being said, you are still taking a risk. And if you do get caught, please don’t tell authorities, 「Tony from Panda Guides said it was ok.」 

Oh, and make sure to you leave Lucille and your dead seahorses at home.

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