Here are some very short, funny quotes:
1. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode."
2. "Crazy people have more fun... and better stories to tell."
3. "Procrastination is my superpower."
4. "My therapist says I should get a hobby. My response? 'Shh, I'm busy playing video games'."
5. "I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer it over people."
6. "Today's goals: Eat pizza, watch Netflix, pretend to be a functioning member of society."
7. "My life is a mess, but my beard looks great!"
8. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."
9. "Pizza is the answer to all of life's questions... and also what I had for breakfast."
10. "When in doubt, add glitter."
11. "Warning: The following person may be operating a vehicle while simultaneously playing 'Can you top this?'"
12. "Life hack: When someone asks how your day was, respond with 'It was lit' and pretend you're cool."
13. "My cat is not plotting against me... or am I just paranoid?"
14. "I'm not saying I'm lazy, but I've been on the couch for 3 days and I still have all my limbs."
15. "Don't worry about tomorrow, today has enough problems."
These quotes are designed to be short, snappy, and funny!
I've got a collection of funny and inspiring quotes that will make you laugh and nod your head in agreement! Here are some short inspirational quotes about life:
1. "Life is like a pizza, even when it's bad, it's still pretty good."
2. "You can't buy happiness, but you can buy ice cream and that's kind of the same thing."
3. "Sometimes I think I'm not doing enough with my life, then I remember I'm still breathing and that's something."
4. "Life is a journey, not a destination. Unless the destination has free Wi-Fi and a good coffee shop."
5. "The best way to get over someone is to find someone who likes pineapple on pizza."
6. "You're not lazy, you're just conserving energy... for binge-watching Netflix later."
7. "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. Or in my case, 10% reacting and 90% eating ice cream."
8. "Don't count the days, make the days count. Unless you're counting down to the weekend, then go ahead and count those days too."
9. "Life is like a rollercoaster, except instead of going up and down, it's just a series of awkward silences and unfulfilled expectations."
10. "The most important thing in life is to stop saying 'I wish' and start saying 'I will'. Unless you're wishing for pizza, then you can keep saying 'I wish' all day long."
11. "Life is 5% what happens and 95% how you react to it. Or in my case, 100% reacting with sarcasm."
12. "Don't worry about making mistakes, just make them and then Google the answer. That's basically how I got through college."
13. "Life is like a video game, except instead of leveling up, you're just trying not to die. And sometimes you still do."
14. "You're not too old for adventure, unless your idea of adventure is taking a nap and watching reruns of The Golden Girls."
15. "Life is 10% what happens and 90% how you react to it. Or in my case, 100% reacting with eye-rolling."
I hope these quotes bring a smile to your face and inspire you to take on life's challenges with humor and enthusiasm!
Here are some funny and inspirational short quotes for success:
1. "Believe you can and you're halfway there. The other half is just a bunch of stuff that's gonna happen anyway."
2. "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It's the coffee in between that matters."
3. "Don't watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going."
4. "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. (And now I'm a successful entrepreneur.)"
5. "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. And also, you should probably take more shots in general."
6. "Remember why you started. Now go make it happen... or just take a nap, we won't judge."
7. "Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out. Or, as I like to call it, 'adulting'."
8. "Don't limit yourself because of other people's opinions. Just remember that you're awesome... and also, wear sunscreen."
9. "I'm not a morning person. But I am a successful person. So, yeah, that's a thing now."
10. "You don't have to be great to start, but if you don't start, you'll never be great. Unless you're really bad at starting things in which case, just give up now."
11. "Success is not about being the best; it's about being better than your previous self. And also, eating a whole pizza by yourself."
12. "You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream." Unless you're over 30 and still playing video games all day.
13. "The only way to do great work is to love what you do. Or, at the very least, tolerate it until your paycheck clears."
14. "Don't let fear hold you back from pursuing your dreams. Unless your dream is to become a professional clown; in that case, good luck with that."
15. "The key to success is to keep learning and growing. And also, having a really great therapist."
16. "Success is not about achieving perfection; it's about being willing to make mistakes and learn from them." Unless you're trying to build a Lego castle; in that case, just use the instructions.
17. "You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and adjust your course from there. And also, you should probably take out the trash."
18. "The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Unless you're thinking about what to eat for lunch; in that case, just order pizza."
19. "Success is not solely dependent on intelligence or talent; it's largely dependent on effort and perseverance." Unless you're trying to win a game of chess; in that case, IQ really does matter.
20. "Don't settle for mediocrity; strive for greatness! Unless you're playing the lottery; in that case, just pick numbers randomly."
I hope these funny and inspirational quotes bring a smile to your face and motivate you towards success!
Here are some funny and inspirational quotes that can motivate students:
1. "You're not lazy, you're just on energy-saving mode... like your phone."
2. "Study hard, but don't forget to have fun too! (That's what my parents told me anyway)"
3. "Don't watch Netflix during finals week... unless you want to become a professional couch warmer"
4. "When in doubt, add more coffee. And when in finals week, add even more coffee"
5. "You're not failing math, math is just failing you (and then some)"
6. "It's okay to not know everything. That's what Google is for... and also your teachers"
7. "Don't give up! You can do it! (Or at least pretend like you're going to try until someone offers you a snack)"
8. "You don't have to be great to start, but if you want to be great, you have to start... and then actually show up for class"
9. "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. When life gives you homework, just pretend it's lemonade"
10. "Believe in yourself! (And also believe that your teachers will probably forget about the assignment anyway)"
11. "You're not too cool to learn. You're just... really good at pretending like you're too cool"
12. "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it's just a really annoying grade on your transcript"
13. "Don't compare yourself to others. Compare yourself to who you were yesterday... and try to be better than that guy"
14. "You don't have to be a genius to succeed. You just have to be willing to put in the effort (and maybe eat some Pop-Tarts)"
15. "When all else fails, remember: your grades are not a reflection of your worth as a human being... but they're still kinda important"
I hope these quotes bring a smile and some motivation to students!
I've got you covered! Here are some funny, yet inspiring, quotes about life and struggles:
1. "Life is like a puzzle. Sometimes the pieces don't fit, but that's okay because it makes for a great story."
2. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode... like my phone."
3. "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. And then immediately spill it and forget where you put the sugar."
4. "My struggles are like traffic jams – they're frustrating, but I'll get there eventually."
5. "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react... and also 100% how good your Wi-Fi is."
6. "Don't worry about making mistakes. Just remember that everyone else is too busy making their own mistakes to notice yours."
7. "When life gets tough, just remember that you're not alone... and neither are the zombies in your backyard."
8. "I'm not arguing, I'm just passionately expressing my point of view while completely dismissing yours."
9. "Life is like playing a game of Jenga – sometimes you take risks, but mostly you just hope the tower doesn't collapse on your head."
10. "If life gives you rain, make an umbrella cake... or just stay inside and binge-watch Netflix."
11. "Struggles are like snowflakes – they're unique, fleeting, and will probably melt away soon anyway."
12. "Life is a rollercoaster – sometimes it's up, sometimes it's down, but mostly it's just stuck in the middle of a loop-the-loop."
13. "When life gets tough, don't give up – unless you have a really good excuse... like running out of snacks."
14. "Life is like baking a cake – sometimes it turns out perfectly, and other times it's just a big mess that needs to be thrown away."
15. "Don't worry about the struggles – just remember that they're temporary and will eventually become great stories to tell at parties."
I hope these quotes bring a smile to your face and inspire you to tackle life's challenges with humor and resilience!
I've got some great ones for you! Here are very short, funny quotes about life:
1. "Life is like a pizza: even when it's bad, it's still pretty good."
2. "Adulting is just pretending to be responsible while secretly eating cereal for dinner."
3. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode... indefinitely."
4. "Procrastination is my superpower. I can do nothing in 30 seconds or less."
5. "Life hack: when someone asks you how your day was, respond with 'it's been a real adventure' and walk away slowly."
6. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right... repeatedly."
7. "My life motto: eat, sleep, repeat (and occasionally wonder where it all went wrong)."
8. "If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried."
9. "Life is short, but Netflix is forever."
10. "Warning: my thoughts are unfiltered and may contain sarcasm. Proceed with caution."
11. "My superpower is making excuses for not having any superpowers."
12. "The best way to predict the future is to make a bunch of random choices and see what happens."
Hope these made you LOL!
I've got some great ones for you! Here are some funny and inspirational work quotes to brighten up your day:
1. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right. And that's my job description." - Unknown
2. "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then throw the lemons back at life because it didn't ask for your input in the first place."
3. "Work is a four-letter word: W-O-R-K. But honestly, I love my job (most days)."
4. "If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried." - Unknown
5. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode. Like your phone, but without the occasional 'low battery' alert."
6. "My work is my hobby, and my hobby is to make money so I can buy more work-related stuff."
7. "When you're at work, pretend you're a cat: pounce on opportunities, scratch out unnecessary tasks, and take naps when no one's looking."
8. "If you can't beat them, join them. And then secretly sabotage their efforts because, let's be real, competition is exhausting."
9. "The secret to success is not being afraid of failure. Or, you know, just doing what you're told and pretending it's your idea in the first place."
10. "Life is short, but workweeks are long. So take breaks, stretch, and remind yourself that Friday will come eventually (or at least that's what I keep telling myself)."
11. "The best part of working from home? You can wear PJs to 'work' and no one will judge you... until your boss asks for a meeting on Zoom."
12. "I'm not stressed, I'm just passionately expressing my enthusiasm for all things work-related. (Cue the drama music)."
13. "What's the best way to motivate yourself at work? Fake it till you make it. Or, you know, actually try hard and stuff."
14. "Work is a journey, not a destination. Unless your destination is a comfy couch with a never-ending supply of coffee and snacks, in which case, you're doing it wrong."
15. "If you love what you do, you'll never work a day in your life... unless you have to meet a deadline or deal with office politics. Then it's back to reality."
I hope these funny inspirational work quotes made your day a little brighter and reminded you that even the most mundane tasks can be tackled with humor and enthusiasm!
Here are some funny and crazy quotes for you:
1. **I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.** (Thanks, Facebook)
2. **Life is short, but snacks are forever.**
3. **Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!** (Okay, maybe this one's a bit corny...)
4. **My therapist told me I have 30 days to come up with a new excuse for why I'm late.**
5. **I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode... like your phone.**
6. **If at first you don't succeed, skydiving might not be the best idea.**
7. **What's the difference between a pizza and a calzone? One's a circle of happiness, the other's a folded disappointment.**
8. **I'm reading a book about anti-gravity... it's impossible to put down!** (Groan...)
9. **Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!** (Okay, maybe this one's a bit of a dad joke...)
10. **My life is like a puzzle... and I'm still trying to find the missing piece.**