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法國大文豪米歇爾.德.蒙田曾經說過
The french essayist, michel de montaigne, once said...
我認為吃活人比吃死人
"i think there is more barbarity in eating a man alive...
更加野蠻
Than in eating him dead."
至理名言
The wisdom of it.
當你還是個不諳世事的孩子時
When you're a kid with an open soul...
大人們告訴你世界是由壞人和好人構成
They tell you the world consists of good guys and bad guys.
我一直喜歡壞人
I always liked the bad guys.
我喜歡疤面人勝過超人
Scarface over superman.
對摩尼教徒的我來說
The psychology of depravity was far more
墮落的哲學比起仁義道德
Compelling to my manichaean imagination...
更加能激起我的興趣
Than a portrait of benevolence.
其實 善惡並非那麼涇渭分明
The truth is, good and bad are not so absolute.
就我來說
As for me...
我送人一個拇指表達其實是仁慈
There are times I'd give a thumb for a little benevolence.
三周前
Three weeks earlier.
你給了我個"d" 我從沒有得過"d"
You gave me a "d." I don't get d's.
你的作業只能夠得"d" 我也是那麼給分的
When you do "d" work, you get a "d."
我們正在做愛 伊萊
We're fucking, eli.
-什麼 你和我做愛是為了得到個好成績 -當然不是
- what, you're fucking me for a good grade? - no.
我給你們留道題目
So I leave you with a question.
一個加利福尼亞奶農謀殺了三個年輕女孩
A northern california dairy farmer murders three young girls...
在她們的屍體上留有性侵犯的痕跡
Performs sexual acts with their dead bodies...
然後吃掉了她們大腿上的一部分肉
And then eats portions of their fleshy thighs.
你們認為這個奶農瘋了嗎
Is the dairy farmer crazy?
見鬼 當然
Fuck, yeah.
給你你們一點提示 這個問題
Let me give you a hint. this is not a question...
沒有例如"是" "否"或者"見鬼 當然"這樣的確切答案
That can be answered with a "yes" or a "no" or a "fuck, yeah."
空的 空的 空的
Empty. empty. empty.
你今天有買過一杯咖啡嗎
Did you even buy a cup of coffee today?
出於好奇心 你拿這個破杯子
Just out of curiosity, how many days old...
來我們這兒蹭牛奶喝 有多久了
Is that raggedy cup you keep filling with our free milk?
-三天了 -所以我要沒收你的杯子
- hmm. three. - so I'm gonna have to confiscate your cup.
別
No
巴克利·麥可遜 人文社會學博士生
Barkley Michaelson PhD.Candidate in Anthropology
這感覺太爽了
I'm enjoying this... so much.
伊萊·麥可遜博士 化學教授
Eli Michaelson,Phd. Professor of Chemistry
周一把作業交到我桌上 要至少三頁
Three pages on my desk by monday.
謝謝各位
Thank you all.
莎拉·麥可遜 醫學博士 刑事精神分析專家
Sarah Michaelson,MD Forensic Psychiatrist
你等等 如果你下次再遲到
Just a second, you. next time you're late for this class...
我會把你帶出去 扭斷你的大拇指
You're gonna trip on your way out and break your shooting thumb.
你懂了嗎
You get me?
馬克思·馬瑞爾 偵探
Max Mariner Detctive
這個冷漠的世界 就是為了讓你的靈魂墮落
this world is cold, designed to corrupt your soul
這至始至終不會改變
and it will never change
這個冷漠的世界 就是為了讓你的靈魂墮落
this world is cold, designed to corrupt your soul
這至始至終不會改變
and it will never change
這個冷漠的世界 就是為了讓你的靈魂墮落
this world is cold, designed to corrupt your soul
這至始至終不會改變
and it will never change
這個冷漠的世界 就是為了讓你的靈魂墮落
this world is cold, designed to corrupt your soul
這至始至終不會改變
and it will never change
撒迪厄斯·詹姆斯 自學成才者
Thaddeus James Autodidact
我正處於人生的低谷 簡直是地獄一般
Right now I am stuck in a deep life rut here. it's a grave-like trench.
你也看到了 我正在做我的博士論文
You see, I'm trying to finish my ph. d. thesis...
每周只有父親給的$35零用錢 你明白嗎
And get by on a $35-a-week allowance from my father, okay?
我最多只能花$4.40買...
So as much as I would love to spend the $4.40 on a...
一杯摩卡咖啡和一根法式麵包
Mocha spin and a seeded baguette...
我時常會想起塞繆爾·詹森的詩句
I am constantly reminded of the words of samuel johnson-
為什麼給"你的摯愛"一個"d"
Why would you give your own lover a "d"?
柏斯·查普曼 研究生
Beth Chapman Grad Student
柏斯 我非常失望
Beth, I am disappointed
你居然期望我會特殊照顧你
that you would expect preferential treatment.
胡扯 伊萊 胡扯
It's bullshit, eli. it's bullshit.
你這是故意的
You're punishing me. you are.
你故意給我"d"好讓我和你上床
You're punishing me for sleeping with you.
"這裡記載著學者們的生活中的遭遇
"there mark what ills the scholar's life assail-
辛勞 嫉妒 貧困 贊助人和牢獄"
Toil, envy, want, the patron and the jail."
-你好 請說 -辦公室來了個電話
- hello. speaking. - the office got a call.
好像你的丈夫獲得了諾貝爾獎
Seems as though your husband won the nobel prize.
那會讓他更加自大的
Well, that should cement his ego.
不是每天都有人贏得保齡球獎盃的
Hey, it's not every day somebody wins the bowling trophy...
更別提諾貝爾獎了
Let alone the nobel prize.
巴克利·麥可遜 你父親剛打電話過來
Barkley michaelson, your father called.
他說他獲得了諾貝爾獎
He has just won the nobel prize.
真他媽的走運
Lucky fucking son of a bitch.
祝賀你
Congratulations.
祝賀你 麥可遜博士 你真棒
Congratulations, dr. michaelson. you rock.
謝謝 謝謝
Thank you. thank you.
如果這件屋子裡還有人質疑我超凡的智力
If anyone in this room ever doubted my intellectual superiority...
或者質疑能夠當我的學生是多麼幸運
Or your great fortune to be under my incomparable tutelage...
那麼現在可以吻我的屁股了
You can now formally kiss my fine white ass.
-祝賀你 伊萊 -恭喜你 伊萊
- congratulations, eli. - congratulations, eli.
幹得好
Good job.
伊萊 我覺得這證明了諾貝爾獎不是什麼大眾流行獎
Well, eli, I guess this proves the nobel is not a popularity contest.
這是一件好事 西蒙
And a good thing, simon...
如果諾貝爾獎是大眾獎的話 你也可以去參選了
'cause if it were, you might actually have a shot at winning.
-你看上去真棒 -謝謝
- you look great. - thank you.
這領帶沒問題吧
Is this tie all right?
是不是有人忘記告訴老爸這只是半正式場合
Did someone forget to tell dad that this was a semi-formal affair?
他知道的
He knew.
這麼穿是為了顯示他很特殊
Anything to crystallize his advantage, huh?
吃的東西在哪裡
where's the chow?
我們每個人都為你感到自豪 伊萊
Everyone's very proud of you, eli.
我得了諾貝爾獎這真是一件美事
Well, it's a damn good thing I won the nobel...
因為現在你會發現想解僱我是很困難的
Because now you're gonna find it hard as hell to fire me.
我從沒有威脅要解僱你 伊萊
Oh, I never threatened to fire you, eli.
我是一個科學家 哈維
I'm a scientist, harvey,
根據我對周圍的觀察表明
And the empirical evidence I'm looking at around here...
這裡沒有人喜歡我
Tells me no one loves me anymore.
我喜歡你
I loved you.
伊萊 聽著 我也是個科學家
Eli. look, I'm a scientist too...
根據我的觀察到的證據
And my empirical observations tell me...
早在我要解僱你之前就有人在詆毀你
That someone's gonna shoot you long before I have to fire you.
有人說你和小女生 我什麼都沒看見
Young lady- I'm closing my eyes.
你真的認為那個化學系的追星小丫頭
Do you really think that little nymph of a chemistry groupie...
和我那個頑固又專制的老爸有一腿?
Is having an affair with my ancient, tyrannical dad?
-老媽 -不 等等
- mom. - no. wait.
很高興你能來 柏斯 我喜歡你這件衣服
Nice of you to come, beth. love the outfit.
離期末考試還有兩周
Final exams are in two weeks.
如果考試沒得"a" 我就把關於
If I don't get an "a," I'm gonna tell the whole world...
我和你的那些醜事抖出去
About my scandalous affair with you.
不幸的是
Unfortunately,
這將是第一次諾貝爾獎得主牽涉性醜聞
It won't be the first nobel prize winner with a sex scandal.
對 對 不過考慮到卡爾頓· 格瑟特博士和他的密西西比男孩們
Yes, yes. dr. carleton gajdusek and his micronesian boys.
我認為他們才是第一個性醜聞事件
I think he was in another league- sexually, that is.
我可是認真的
I'm so totally serious.
不就是個"a"嘛 你得到了
An "a" it is. you earned it.
我喜歡你這樣 柏斯
I like you like this, beth.
你是多麼淘氣
You look naughty.
當我從斯德哥爾摩回來
What I wouldn't do to tear the clothes...
我何嘗不想立刻撕破你的衣服
Right off your gorgeous little body right this very second.
欣賞你嬌小柔美的身軀 但現在 你得離開這裡
When I get back from stockholm. now, go on. get out of here.
她擔心期末考試前兩周
She feels like I'm abandoning the class
我會缺課
two weeks before their final exam.
因為那兩周我正在做去斯德哥爾摩前的準備工作
Which I am in effect doing by going to stockholm.
看到嗎 西蒙 至少我的學生喜歡我
You see, simon? at least my students are fond of me.
謝謝各位今晚出席 你們有人出於自願
I'd like to thank you all for coming tonight. some of you willingly.
有人出於被迫
Some of you in spite of yourselves.
但無論怎樣 明天我就要去接受我的諾貝爾獎
Tomorrow I'm off to claim my nobel prize.
我的妻子 莎拉 會和我同行
Joining me will be my wife, sarah...