譯者：Fleetwood
原文作者：Allee Manning & Kaitlyn Kelly
發布：2016-11-25
來源：http://article.yeeyan.org/view/51436/508087
Wasting Money On A Wedding Vs. Wasting
揮霍：為婚禮？還是為自己？
Everyone knows that weddings—the most elaborate and costly form of old school pageantry still acceptable in modern society—are stupid expensive. But it turns out Americans are now blowing even more money than ever before on what’s supposed to be the most magical day of any couple’s life together. Money that, to be honest, could be spent on much, much cooler stuff.
每個人都清楚婚禮貴的荒唐至極，這種形式繁瑣且花費高昂的老掉牙慶典方式仍然為現代社會所接受 。本應該是夫妻婚姻生活中最為美妙的一天卻讓美國人揮霍掉比以往任何時候都要多的銀子。老實講，那些銀錢本來可以用來幹許多更酷的事情。
The Knot released its annual wedding survey this week, with findings showing that couples are spending a mind-numbing average of $32,641 on matrimonial celebrations. The study includes data from nearly 18,000 pairs across the country. While the cost of a wedding varied greatly from city to city—reaching a nauseating high of $82,300 in Manhattan—the price was steep no matter where couples chose to get hitched. All this despite the fact that weddings (and marriages in general, honestly) can be a fairly impractical thing to invest in. Seriously, even 50 Cent doesn’t spend as much in a day as you’re spending on a reception band alone. Think about that.
本周，愛結網發布了年度婚慶行業調查報告，調查發現，時下每對夫婦在婚禮上的平均花費達到令人震驚的32,641美金。研究涵蓋了來自全美各地將近18,000夫婦 的數據。儘管婚慶的花消因不同城市而有很大的差異-在曼哈頓這個數字甚至達到了令人厭惡的82,300美金-無論新人在哪裡喜結連理，價格就是那麼的不合情理。 所有這些無視這樣一個事實，那就是：投資婚禮本身就是一件相當不靠譜事情（老實講，婚姻本身大體也是這樣一回事）。說真的，歌手「50分兒」一天的花費也不及你在婚禮慶典上迎賓樂隊一項上的開支。想想看，不是麼？
So rather than buying into the Marriage Industrial Complex on a union that may or may not work out, wouldn’t it make more sense to save your hard-earned money by forgoing the big ceremony for the major expenses you’re likely to face in married life? You know, like a mortgage. Or braces for your wallet-draining children-to-be. And if your fianceé is dead set on a fairytale wedding? You could always just blow your financial load on a plenty fulfilling single life.
與其為了一個未必有好結果的結合而「投資」給婚慶產業公司，倒不如放棄這樣的大陣仗，將節省下來的辛苦錢用到將來婚姻生活中更重要的支出上面，這樣不是更有意義？ 你懂的，比如，房貸，再如，為你那「窮盡你荷包」的孩子們戴上牙箍。如果你的女友堅持要擁有一個童話般的婚禮呢？你也只有將銀子揮霍在那令人愜意的單身生活上。
With nearly $33,000 to spend in the life of a singledom, you could get pretty far when it comes to amenities and entertainment. Perhaps the best part of being free from the shackles of wedding planning is the opportunity to treat yourself. Like, why drop $1,400 on a frilly dress you』ll wear once before it turns to moth food when you can rock the most expensive shoes of the season and look great doing it?
在單身生活中有了可供支配的33,000美金，當談到舒適和消遣的事情，你總可以應付自如。遠離婚禮策劃的桎梏，這事最美的之處在於，你有機會犒賞自己。比如，當你可以腳踏本季最貴的鞋子並且看起來神採奕奕，何必還要去花費1,400美金去買一件只穿一次而後就被蛀掉的裙裝?
And while weddings are supposed to be all about the happy couple, everyone knows that’s bull, because you have to feed your guests and provide them entertainment and put a roof over their heads for a couple of hours and likely go into debt doing it. But screw it. Here’s a modest proposal: instead of shelling out nearly $600 on a tiered fondant monstrosity for your guests, you could always splurge on a year’s worth of Brazilian bikini waxes. As the saying goes: Let them eat cake.
婚禮的主角理應是快樂的夫妻，每個人都知道這是屁話，你要為賓客供給這幾個小時的食物，娛樂消遣以及棲身之所，並且因此而負債纍纍。算了，不說這些了。給你一個小小的建議，與其花費將近600美金，為來賓準備多層方旦糖怪物，不如將它揮霍在足夠一年使用的巴西比基尼蠟上面。還是那句名言，任由他們去吃蛋糕吧！
In addition to simply having fun, there are some more practical ways to spend your wedding purse as well. For instance, purchasing and providing for a nice house cat rather than dropping major dough on finger bling intended for fending off hotties for the rest of your life. Fluffy won’t care if you bring home someone new every weekend—he』ll just hate everyone indiscriminately. Or you could save money on that expensive ceremony venue by purchasing your own funeral casket. Sure, you don’t get to take that momentous walk down the aisle, but what’s that worth, really, when we all die alone?
除了直截了當擁有歡樂，同時還有一些更有效方式使用你的婚禮資金。比如，購買並豢養一隻家貓，而不是花大價錢購置豪華戒指-足以讓那些辣妹對你敬而遠之。然而，毛茸茸的小貓才不在乎你是否會在每個周末帶回陌生人- 他就是那樣一視同仁地「敵視」每個人。再有，去買一副棺材，以此節省昂貴的慶典場地費用。當然，你不會籍此而步入婚禮殿堂，但當我們孤獨老去，婚禮又價值幾何？