洛杉磯集中了美國一小半華人，這裡的聖誕節和新年當然也有濃濃中國文化味道，就看那些每天晚上燈火輝煌的華人餐廳就知道這「味道」有多強。你很難在美國看到俄國餐廳，也不會看到規模如此大的猶太人街道，即使是那些越南人把所有商鋪加起來也比不上另一群越南人---我們的越南華僑社區。在這裡久了好像並沒有真正活在美國，而是在另一個獨特的「中國」。那些洗腳哥哥和餐館侍應妹妹們即使不會英語也活的和別人沒什麼兩樣。至少表面上看就是如此。
唐人街的熱鬧過節氣氛讓美國人十分好奇，這兩年美國的商鋪不是門可羅雀便是關門大吉，怎唯獨中國人社區依然歌舞平生？當然，這和那些推著大包小包下飛機的中國移民有關係，這些人中有投資移民，也有企業移民，也有留學生，還有更多的是各地來的親屬移民們，他們心裡都想著一件事，那就是如何在美國安頓下來。為了好好立足，把原來家裡的細軟都帶來了，有房子的也賣了，把房款收入在美國另買一套；沒房子的也賣了，還了銀行貸款剩下的帶過來權當半年內找不到工作的生活費，中國房地產如此就變成了移民們的取款機。當然，這還是無法安慰新移民的忐忑的心，他們把小算盤打得滴答響，不論到哪裡都把人民幣和美元比價一番，這個比中國貴，那個比中國便宜，久而久之，美國人硬生生地總結了六十條「中國人臉譜」，可正是這些中國人借錢給了他們高消費。
1. You look like you are 18.你看起來好像才18歲。
（東方人普遍看起來比較年輕啊）
2.You like to eat chicken feet.
你喜歡吃雞爪。
3.You suck on fish heads and fish fins.
你吃魚時會吸魚頭和魚鰭。
(他們都是直接切掉的)
4.You have a Chinese knick-knack hanging on your rear view mirror.
你的車子後視鏡上會弔中國擺設。
5.You sing karaoke.
你唱K。
(唐人街才有的玩意兒)
6.Your house is covered with tile.
你的房子鋪的是瓷磚。
(老外都是木板)
7.Your kitchen is covered by a sticky film ofgrease.
你的廚房覆蓋著一層厚厚的油脂。
(愛炒東西的緣故吧)
8.Your stove is covered with aluminum foil.
你的爐子上面有鋁箔。
9.You leave the plastic covers on your remote control.
你的遙控器外包著塑料。
10.You'venever kissed your mom or dad.
你從沒吻過你父母。
11.You've never hugged your mom or dad.
你從沒抱過你父母。
12.Your unassisted vision is worse than 20/500.
你的視覺想像力低於20/500。
13.You wear contacts, to avoid wearing your "coke bottle glasses".
你戴隱形眼鏡,這樣才能避免戴你的"瓶底眼鏡"。
（中國人的眼鏡真的都那麼厚嗎？）
14.You've worn glasses since you were in fifth grade.
你五年級開始就戴眼鏡了。
15.Your hair sticks up when you wake up.
你睡醒後頭髮會豎起來。
16.You'll haggle over something that is not negotiable.
你會為一些毋庸置疑的事情辯論。
17.You love to use coupons.
你喜歡用折價券。
18.You drive around looking for the cheapestpetrol.
你為了最便宜的汽油費不惜開著車子到處找。
19.You drive around for hours looking for the best parking space.
你開著車子兜圈為了找到最好的停車位。
20.Youtake showers at night.
你晚上洗澡。
(許多美國人都是早上洗)
21.You avoid the non-free snacks in hotel rooms.
旅店房間裡的非免費食品你都不吃。
22.You don't mind squeezing 20 people into one motel room.
你不介意二十個人擠一間汽車旅房。
23.Most girls have more body hair than you, if you are male.
如果你是男人,那麼你身上的體毛比大多數女人少。
24.You tap the table when someone pours tea for you.
別人為你倒茶你就用手敲一下桌子。
25.You say "Aiya!" and "Wah!" frequently.
你經常說"哎(二聲)呀(四聲)"和"哇(四聲)"。
26.You don't want to wear your seatbelt because it is uncomfortable.
你不喜歡系安全帶因為安全帶讓你感覺不舒服。
27.You love Las Vegas,slot machines, and black jack.
你喜歡拉斯維加斯、老虎機和二十一點。
(中國人好賭,地球人都知道)
28.You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can reuse the paper.
你細心地打開你的聖誕節禮物,因為你要留著包裝紙再用。
29.You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off.
你只會在聖誕節後買聖誕卡,因為打五折。
30.Youhave a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table.
你的廚房桌子上有一條抹布。
31.You spit bones and other food craps on the table.That's why youneed the vinyl tablecloth.
你把骨頭和其他東西都吐在桌子上,所以你必須有抹布。
32.You have stuff in the freezer since the beginning of time.
你的電冰箱存著一萬年前的食物。
33.You use the dishwasher as a dish rack.
你把洗碗機當碗櫥。
34.You have never used your dishwasher.
你從來沒用過你的洗碗機。
35.You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times.
你有一個熱水瓶裡面永遠裝著熱水。
36.You eat all meals in the kitchen.
你在廚房吃飯。
37.You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers.
你把用過的塑膠袋、錫紙和錫盤都留著。
38.You have a piano in your living room.
你客廳裡有一架鋼琴。
39.You pick your teeth at the dinner table (but you cover your mouth).
你會在餐桌上剔牙,但手遮著嘴。
40.You twirl your pen around your fingers.
你會轉筆。
41.You hate to waste food.
你討厭浪費食物。
42.You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftoverchicken wing.
你冰箱裡有三口剩飯或一個雞翅。
43.You don't own any real Tupperware-only a cupboard full of used but carefullyrinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars.
你其實從來都不用特百惠，你的碗櫃裡全是洗乾淨的黃油盒、外帶餐盒和果醬瓶。
44.You also use the jam jars as drinking glasses.
你還把果醬瓶當水杯用。
45.You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every timeyou stay in a hotel.
你有收集旅館免費洗髮水瓶子的愛好。
46.You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel(travel means any carride longer than 15 minutes).These snacks are always dried and include driedplums, mango, and squid.
你每次外出十五分鐘以上就都會帶著你的零食:幹李子、幹芒果或烤魷魚。
47.You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it.
你會洗2-3次米。
48.Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself.
你爸以為自己可以修任何東西。
49.The dashboard of your Honda is covered by hundreds of small toys.
你的車子裡堆了無數玩偶。
50.Youdon't use measuring cups.
你不用量杯。
51.You beat eggs with chopsticks.
你用筷子打雞蛋。
52.You have a teacup with a cover on it.
你有一個有蓋的茶杯.
53.You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since callinginformation costs 50 cents.
你總是在電話簿裡找電話號碼,因為諮詢電話費用為五角。
54.You only make long distance calls after 11 pm.
你只在11點後打長途。
55.If you are male, you clap at something funny and if you are female, yougiggle whilst placing a hand over your mouth.
遇到什麼好笑的，如果你是男的就會拍掌大笑，女的就會手捂著嘴咯咯地笑。
56.You like Chinese films in their original undubbed versions.
你喜歡沒有配過音的中國電影。
57.You love Chinese Martial Arts films.
你喜歡中國功夫片。
58.You've learnt some form of martial arts.
你會一些中國武術。
59.Shaolin actually means something to you.
少林對你來說是有含義的。
60.Youlike congee with thousand-year-old eggs.
你喜歡很老的有蛋的粥。
61.You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached.
你喜歡有頭尾的蝦。
62.You never call your parents just to say hi.
你從不為了問聲好而給你父母打電話。
63.If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten,even if it's midnight.
如果你不在家,你的父母會打電話問你吃了嗎,就算半夜12點也不例外。
64.When you're sick, your parents tell you not to eat fried foods or bakedgoods due to yeet hay.
當你病了的時候,你父母要你不吃油炸食品和烤的東西,因為「熱氣」。
（yeet hay 粵語發音）
65.You know what yeet hay is.
你知道什麼是熱氣。
66.You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you are only 10 feetapart.
你上班時給你中國朋友發郵件,即使你們只相距10尺。
67.You use a face cloth.
你敷面膜。
68.You starve yourself before going to all-you-can-eat places.
你去吃自助餐前會把自己餓個半死。
69.You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry or electronics.
你認識可以打折賣給你珠寶或電器的人。
70.Yousave your Coke bottle glasses even though you're never going to use them again.
你留著用過的可樂瓶。
71.You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it.
你有自己的切肉刀而且你會磨它。
72.Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin.
你的牙膏都擠到紙一樣薄。
73.You know what moon cakes are.
你知道什麼是月餅。
74.When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them inyour closet or in the bedroom of an adult who has moved out.
當廁紙降價時,你買了100多卷並囤在衣櫥或別人的房間裡。
75.Your parents know how to launch nasal projectiles.
你的父母懂得如何用力擤鼻涕。
76.You iron your own shirts.
你自己燙衣服。
77.You play a musical instrument.
你會彈奏一種樂器。
78.Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away theleftovers on the table, you'll finish them.
即使你飽了,當別人要把剩下的菜倒掉時你會一嘴把它吃完。
79.You've eaten a red bean popsicle.
你吃過紅豆冰棍。
80.Youbring oranges with you as a gift when you visit people's homes.
你拜訪別人時會帶著橘子。
81.You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
你在餐後搶著付帳單。
82.You major in something practical like engineering, medicine or law.
你的主科是實用型的,工程學、機械或法律。
83.You live with your parents and you are 30 years old(and they prefer it thatway). Or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in the apartment nextdoor to your parents, or at least in the same neighborhood.
你三十歲時還和父母住在一起並且他們也喜歡你這樣，或者你已經三十歲並且結婚了,但你還住在父母隔壁或同個小區。
84.You don't tip more than 10% at a restaurant, and if you do,you tip Chinesedelivery guys.
你不會給超過10%的小費,即使有也是給中國服務員。
85.You have acquired a taste for bitter melon.
你愛好吃苦瓜。
86.You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last pieceof food on the table.
你吃光碗裡的最後一粒米,但不吃盤裡的最後一口菜。