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來杯咖啡吧
都是荷爾蒙作祟
It's hormonal.
我遇事一般不退縮的 但這是女人的事情
I mean, I don't usually fall back on... It's women's issues.
她裝了什麼兒童安全用品 防護門什麼的嗎
But child-proofed how? Gates and stuff?
夥計 她改裝了抽屜
Dude, she did the drawers.
我們甚至還不知道是否能懷上
We don't even know if this whole fertility thing's gonna work...
她就鼓搗這些東西
she's screwed in these little
我現在都打不開抽屜了
jobbies where you can't even open the drawers.
一點都打不開嗎
At all?
能打開一英寸左右 只夠把指頭塞進去
No. They open an inch, then you gotta dig your finger in.
-太可怕了 -遲早能用上...
- It's a nightmare. -I guess sooner or later..
還早著呢 她還改裝了頂櫃
Yeah, a lot later. She did the upper cabinets.
孩子得到三十歲才夠得著
Kid will be 30 before he can reach them,
前提還得是我們能有孩子
assuming we have a kid.
保護孩子是母親的天性
It is natural for her to feel protective.
別說你懂... 你不懂女人
Don't even... You have women's issues.
得了吧 算你最懂
Please. You of all people.
那是個兇兆
Oh, come on. It's a jinx.
它說明我們肯定懷不上
It guarantees that we won't get pregnant.
我他媽花了二十分鐘才拿到瓶啤酒
And it takes me about 20 minutes to get a fucking beer.
等一下
Guys. Guys!
斯德哥爾摩失敗了
Stockholm went south.
真的嗎 我還以為他們狀況不錯
Seriously? I thought they were looking good.
出了什麼問題
What cracked?
我還沒看錄像 也才聽人說的
I haven't seen the footage. Word's just going around.
沒有百分百成功的方案
Well, that's never been a stable scenario.
地球人都知道瑞典人靠不住
Everyone knows you can't trust Swedes.
那意味著只有日本和我們了
That means there's just Japan. Japan and us.
不是第一次出現這種情況了
It's not the first time it's come down to that.
日本一直保持著完美記錄
Japan has a perfect record.
我們排第二 得加把勁了
We're number two. We try harder.
如果我們失敗了
If we fail, then...
拜託 從98年來我們就沒出過差池
Please. We haven't had a glitch since '98.
我們知道自己在幹什麼 林
We know what we're doing, Lin.
至少都記在... 什麼地方了
Or we have it written down... somewhere.
你們最好別搞砸了
You guys better not be messing around in there.
你意思是說你不打算
Does this mean you're not
參加今年的賭博了 好多錢呢
in the betting pool this year? Big money.
我意思是說 這次的方案很重要
I'm just saying, it's a key scenario.
你剛才可不是這意思
No, I hear what you're saying.
98年那次是化學部出的錯 對吧
In '98, it was the chem department's fault, right?
你是哪個部門的來著
Where do you work, again?
不用說了 我又想起來了
Wait. It's coming back to me, now.
每個人都這麼難搞 這周末可就難熬了
It's gonna be a long weekend if everyone's that puckered up.
你周一晚上來我家吧
So you wanna come over Monday night?
我準備用電鑽解放我的頂櫃
I'm gonna pick up some power drills. Liberate my cabinets.
你到底有沒有在聽我說話
Are you even listening to me?
林中小屋
不去嘗試
You never get that taste
怎會知道滋味
Out of your mouth
不入雞舍
You'll never get the paw prints
怎會發現爪印
Out of the hen house now
歸途漫漫
And you can't go back
也不能走來時路
Same way you came
集齊所有碎片
Round all the pieces up
也不能破鏡重圓
But they just don't fit the same
極度緊張
White knuckles
也不算太壞
Maybe it's not so bad
別再拘束
So let your hair down now
極度緊張
White knuckles
猥瑣叫獸
Professor fuckwad.
為什麼你不用飛鏢
Why haven't you stuck
射這混蛋的臉
that asshole's picture on the dartboard yet?
沒那麼簡單 老天啊
It's not that simple. Oh, my God!
你染頭髮了 還是金色的
Your hair. It's blonde.
超讚 不是嗎
Very fabulous, no?
不敢相信你真染了
I can't believe you did it.
但是效果很贊 對吧
But very fabulous, right?
快點說美死了
Hurry up with the "Very fabulous."
不然我要緊張了
I'm getting insecure about it now.
棒極了 科特肯定會神魂顛倒的
No, it looks awesome. Curt's gonna lose it.
科特要感謝我 你也會的
Curt's gonna thank me. And so will you...
因為我要幫你燒了這幅畫
while we're burning this picture.
現在不行
Not ready.
說真的 這不是他的錯
Seriously, this isn't his fault.
哪一點不是他的錯
What's not his fault?
是睡了自己的學生 還是發郵件說分手
Fucking his student or breaking up with her by email?
我一開始就知道我們沒有未來
I knew what I was getting into.
得了吧
Oh, please.
那你知道這周末你該幹什麼嗎
You know what you're getting into this weekend?
這個
This.
如果霍頓和科特說的一樣帥
And if Holden's as cute as Curt says he is..
到時候就有人幫你脫了
possibly getting out of it.
那是我最不想做的事
That is the last thing that I want.
如果你們覺得這樣可以為我療傷
If you treat this like a setup,
那我可一點都玩不起來
I'm gonna have no fun at all.
我不會逼你
I'm not pushing,
但我們要帶上這個
but we're packing this!
那意味著我們絕對沒有地方放
Which means we definitely won't have room for..
我無聊了怎麼辦
What if I get bored?
看書就不無聊嗎
These will help?
蘇維埃的經濟結構 什麼什麼的後果
Soviet Economic Structures? Aftermath of the..
不 我們有湖又有酒
No! We have a lake and a keg.
-不準學習 -看招
- No more learning! -Think fast.
太敏捷了
Faster than that.
抱歉 抱歉 走吧
Sorry. Sorry. Move along.
-接的好 -那就是霍頓嗎
- Nice! -Is that Holden?
我們馬上下來 他剛從州立學校轉過來
We'll be right down. He just transferred from State.
隊裡最棒的接球手 人也很不錯
Best hands on the team. He's a sweet guy.
而且他手可靈活了
And he's good with his hands.
我在和一個女孩子交往
I'm kinda seeing this girl,
但是你頭髮比她靚多了
but you're way blonder than she is.
我正想 也許 這是什麼
But I was thinking, you know, maybe... What is this?
這是什麼 你拿著這些做什麼
What this? What are you doing with these?
我知道了 我不帶書就是了
Okay, I get it. I'll leave the books.
誰給你的書 誰教你的
No, who gave you these? Who taught you about these?
你教我的 行了吧
I learned it from you, okay?
我看著你學的
I learned it from watching you!
說真的 班內特教授
Seriously, Professor Bennett,
他整個課程都在講這本書
he covers this whole book in his lectures.
你應該讀讀這本
You should read this.
古絡斯基 這本有趣多了
Gurovsky. Now this is way more interesting.
而且 班內特完全沒看過
Also, Bennett doesn't know it by heart,
他會覺得你見解獨到
so he'll think you're insightful.
然後你沒穿褲子
And you have no pants.
該死
Oh, shit!
-東西差不多了吧 -他媽的最好是
- That pretty much it? - Fucking better be.
茱爾絲 就去過個周末 又不是去避難
You know, Jules, it's a weekend, not an evacuation.
相信我 這箱子裡的東西
Trust me. When I say there is nothing in those cases,
都是你喜歡的
you won't be glad I brought.
我這就閉嘴
I'm shutting' right up.
老天啊
Oh, my God.
馬蒂
Marty!
你出什麼毛病了 老兄
Fuck is wrong with you, bro?
這鎮上的人開車都不跟著感覺走
People in this town drive in a very counterintuitive manner.
這點我不說不行
That's what I have to say.
你想在監獄裡過周末嗎
Do you wanna spend the weekend in jail?
我們可都想去我表哥的鄉村小屋
We'd all like to check out my cousin's country home.
馬蒂親愛的 你這樣可不行
Marty. Honey, that's not okay.
據統計
Statistical fact,
警察從來不會攔下邊開車邊吸大麻的人
cops will never pull over a man with a huge bong in his car.
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