學習衛士提供
And We Got Y'all offers
課後輔導 啟導課程
after school tutoring, mentoring programs,
社區服務 心理評估標準輔導
community service, standardized test coaching,
兄弟姐妹[青少年啟導組織]
Big Brother Big Sister,
各種類型的輔導
and just general filling in the cracks.
作為青少年聯絡員 我向你們保證
As youth liaison, I can assure you
不管你想實現什麼 我們都罩著你
that whatever it is you need to succeed, we got y'all.
有任何疑問嗎
So do y'all have any questions?
別害羞 各位 儘管發問
Don't be shy, guys. Fire away.
為什麼你像白人女孩一樣說話
Why you talk like a white girl?
被你看穿了 我是在扮演黑人
You caught me. I'm rocking blackface.
這是種族歧視
That's racist.
還有別的問題嗎
Any other questions?
你頭髮是怎麼回事
What's up with your hair?
你什麼意思
I don't know what you mean.
我表兄可以幫你接發
My cousin can put some tracks in it,
除非你喜歡這樣的髮型
unless you like it like that.
你真無禮 她是非洲人
You rude. She African.
我們都來自非洲
We're all from Africa, guys.
是的 請大家提有關該計劃的問題
Absolutely. Let's stick to questions about the program.
不好意思
Sorry.
你一直以來就想做這工作嗎
Is this what you always wanted to do?
不 但我大學畢業後找到了這份工作
Uh, no, but I got this job after college
正好符合我當時的興趣
and it fit my interest at the time.
-你單身嗎 -問這個不太合適吧
- Are you single? - Uh, I don't think that's appropriate.
她單身
Yeah, she's single.
既然你們這麼感興趣我的私生活
Okay, since you guys are so interested in my personal life,
那我就跟你們說吧 我28 準確說是29
here it is... I'm 28, actually 29,
因為今天是我生日
'cause today's my birthday.
我來自一個很棒的家庭 有大學文憑
I came from a great family, I have a college degree.
我在非盈利組織工作因為我喜歡回饋社會
I work in the nonprofit world because I like to give back.
我和我男友交往5年了
I've been with my boyfriend for five years,
這髮型是我特意去剪的
and I did this to my hair on purpose.
應該夠了吧
So, I hope that covers everything.
有人對學習衛士有疑問嗎
Does anybody actually have any questions about We Got Y'all?
-你怎麼沒結婚 -沒結就沒結
- Why ain't you married? - I'm just not right now.
我爸說現在沒人喜歡
My dad said ain't nobody checkin'
刻薄的黑人女了
for bitter-ass black women anymore.
戴尼斯 你留校察看 馬上道歉
Dayniece, that's detention. Apologize now.
對不起
沒事 跟你爸說
That... that's okay. And tell your dad
黑人女不刻薄
that black women aren't bitter.
她們只是厭倦了被指望將陋就簡
They're just tired of being expected to settle for less.
她的衣服好簡陋
Her outfit settled for less.
《不安感》
第一季第一集
我老闆為幫助貧民窟的小孩
My boss founded a nonprofit
建立了一個非盈利機構
to help kids from the hood,
但她並沒有僱用任何貧民窟的人
but she didn't hire anybody from the hood.
我在布克·T和杜布瓦
I'm torn between the Booker T. method
兩種教學法中糾結
and the DuBois method.
詹姆斯·鮑德溫說什麼會對有色人種
What would James Baldwin say is most beneficial
最有利
for people of color?
你是在說2016年嗎
In 2016? That's what you're talking about?
我來這5年了 他們把我當成
I've been here five years and they think
無所不知的吉祥物
I'm the token with all the answers.
我們問伊薩吧
Let's just ask Issa.
伊薩 "on fleek"[正點]什麼意思
Issa, what's "On fleek"?
我不知道
I don't know what that means.
我當然知道是什麼意思
I know what that shit means.
不過漠然置之是我的拿手好戲
But being aggressively passive is what I do best.
我過去靠寫日記發洩
I used to keep a journal to vent.
現在我都是靠寫說唱歌詞
Now I just write raps.
加油親愛的 今天是我生日
Go, shawty, it's my birthday
可沒人關心 因為我不辦派對
But no one cares because I'm not having a party
因為我心疼自己
'Cause I'm feeling sorry for my... self.
丹尼爾·金
生日快樂 想你
上一次更新 昨天
感情狀態 單身
看 小子 你貌似還單身
Oh, look, nigga, guess you're still single
找不到女人幫你按摩腳趾
Couldn't find another bitch to make your toes tingle
酷斃了
Hot shit.
如果當初我跟隨自己的內心
How different would my life be
我的生活會有多麼不同
if I actually went after what I wanted?
或許我會更像我最好的朋友 莫莉
Maybe I'd be more like my best friend, Molly.
她就像公司裡的威爾·史密斯
She's like the Will Smith of corporate.
他們希望我們對環境更負責
So, they want us to be more environmentally responsible.
不過 講真 我們為什麼需要樹
But it's like, seriously, why do we need trees?
白人喜歡莫莉
White people looove Molly.
黑人也喜歡莫莉
Black people also looove Molly.
贏了 婊子
Domino, bitch!
我到底哪兒沒做對
What am I doing wrong?
慢著 你讓拉文奇家族選擇和解了
Wait. You got the LaVinci family to settle?
-是的 -不可能 怎麼做到的
- Yep. - No frickin' way. How?
我說服了他們的小兒子去作證
I convinced their youngest son to testify.
他的遺產已經保證免受損失
His inheritance was already guaranteed.
天啊 這太不可思議了 請把方法傳授給我
God, that's unbelievable. Please, please teach me your ways.
以後吧
One day.
哈桑
嘿
-是那個阿拉伯男嗎 -是的 他說"嘿"
- Oh, is that that Arab guy? - Yes. He says, "Hey."
我喜歡
I love it.
好可愛 你打算怎麼回
So sweet. What are you gonna write back?
我打給他好了
I think I'm just gonna call him
因為"嘿"意思就是"我想聊天" 對吧
'cause, I mean, "Hey" Means "I wanna talk," Right?
是的 應該是的
Yeah, sure, I think it could.
他說了什麼
What'd he say?
不方便說話 有什麼事
他一定是在開會時給我發的
He... he must be texting me from a meeting.
他是個產品工程師
You know, he's a product engineer,
所以我們說話這會兒他多半正在設計東西呢
so he's probably engineering shit as we speak.
你好像很喜歡他
Seems like you really like him.
是的
You know, I do.
我只是想聽到你的聲音
我們只約會過3次 不過他與眾不同
We've only been on three dates, but he's so different.
我從沒想過我會和一個非黑人的人在一起
I never thought I'd end up with someone who wasn't black.
-你懂嗎 -懂
- You know? - Totally.
我和賈馬爾總是在說
Me and Jamal are always
我們不是對方的菜
talking about how we're not each other's types,
但我們相處得異常好
but, I don't know, it works.
妹子 賈馬爾在胡說
Girl, Jamal is frontin'.
黑人喜歡亞裔女和拉丁女
Niggas love Asians and Latinas
還有印度女 白人女和混血女
and Indians and white chicks and mixed chicks.
不過 如果他們對我沒興趣
But you know what, if they are not checkin' for me,
我也不會對他們有興趣
I ain't checkin' for them.
抱歉 我暫時不想談感情
賈馬爾說我是他的第一個
Jamal said I was his first.
衣索比亞餐廳&市場&禮品店
我們只是順其自然
We were just going with the flow.
毫無預兆 就我個人而言
It came out of nowhere, 'cause, personally,
我覺得我們玩得很開心
I thought we were having a good time.
等等 順其自然是誰的主意
Wait? Whose idea was it to go with the flow?
雙方的
Oh, it was mutual.
好吧 賤人 是他的 但我也不介意
Okay, bitch, it was his, but I was cool with it.
-他多毛嗎 -他是阿拉伯人
- Was he hairy? - He was Arab.
-所以是多毛了 -當然
- So, yeah. - Absolutely.
然後他每天都打我電話
And then he was also, like, calling me every day
給我發簡訊
and sending me text messages.
-我去 -可不是
- Oh, damn. - Right?
然後這個王八蛋竟然敢
And then this motherfucker got the audacity
給老娘發這個
to hit me with this bullshit.
"抱歉 我暫時不想談感情
"Sorry. I'm not looking for a relationship right now.
傷心臉"
Sad face."
他肯定沒發傷心臉 我要給你一巴掌
He did not sad face you. I will slap you right...
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